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Definitions by Dan Jewell

take a shot in the mouth 

To act like, or say that you indeed like or love the band Nickelback in order to bed a hottie of the opposite sex.
Slim: "Yo Dan, you see that fine piece of ass over there with the Nickelback shirt on."
Dan: "Yeah, I'd take a shot in the mouth in order to give her the rectal thermometer.

clam the johnny 

When a female partner has clammy or "sweat soaked hands" and gives you a hand job.
After Michel reached into Dan's pants, Dan looked Michel dead in the eye and said, "Yo, wash your hands first, I didn't think you were going to clam the johnny."
clam the johnny by Dan Jewell March 30, 2005

de-loosify 

To make something feel tighter, such as a vagina, screws, orange juice lids and vaginas.
1. Slim Bavis made the big switch to Tropicana from Minute Maid Orange Juice, because he was unable to de-loosify the lid.

2. Dan Jewell's large member has pulverized many vaginas, causing them to resort to Vaginercises which in turn will de-loosify that nappy dugout.
de-loosify by Dan Jewell March 24, 2005

Vaginercise 

To excercise the vaginal muscles, much like Kegal excercises, in order to de-loosify the yeast pouch.
After two months of grueling Vaginercises, Kelli's pussy was as tight as a butthole.
Vaginercise by Dan Jewell March 24, 2005

yeast pouch 

UUUUUhhhhhhhhh, a vagina.
I've heared that yeast pouches taste like batteries.
yeast pouch by Dan Jewell March 24, 2005

Luke, I am your father 

The climax to a certain situation. Usaully preceded by the "Luke..."
1. In the Movie "Friday", the "Luke, I am your father" is when, Craig whoops Deebo's ass. Yeaahh!!!

2. The "Luke I am your father" of slim bavis's life, was giving the rectal thermometer to his favorite moped.
A virtual farm on the internet. E-Corn, E-Squash, E-Cabbage, E-Lettuce, E-Corn, and E-Tomatoes are readily produced here.
Tired of frequenting the local grocery store, Dan Scianna decided the time was right to make the big switch to E-Farms, where he could purchase E-Corn, E-Squash, E-Cabbage, E-Lettuce, E-Corn, and E-Tomatoes.
e-farm by Dan Jewell March 19, 2005