Definitions by Curtis Claymore
Alabama Crab Bucket
When, in an effort to remove genital lice, one or both parties shave their pubes into a sink, bucket, or other vessel, then light the contents on fire and use bodily fluids to put out the fire.
Bro, she wouldn't get with me last night until I performed an Alabama Crab Bucket. She wanted to see for herself to make sure everything was cool down there.
Alabama Crab Bucket by Curtis Claymore May 20, 2025
Saharan Skiing Accident
When insufficient foreplay forces the man's member to skid dryly across a shaved nether region, resulting in rug burn.
Bro, I don't think she was too into me. We started fooling around, but she gave me a Saharan Skiing Accident. It's red as hell.
Saharan Skiing Accident by Curtis Claymore April 15, 2025
Saskatoon Spitfire
When a male "titty fucks" a girl, but applies hot sauce to his member first, either accidentally or on purpose. The resulting capsaicin-covered ejaculate hits her in the face and causes her to spit and choke violently.
Bro, we had a Thai dinner before getting to the action. I ended up titty fucking her, but I guess I didn't wash my hands after the meal, so she ended up with a Saskatoon Spitfire.
Saskatoon Spitfire by Curtis Claymore April 15, 2025
Croatian Frost Patty
When having sex outdoors in the cold and the male partner's ejaculate hits the ground and freezes solid.
Bro, we did it outside for like two hours, even though it was freezing. We left a huge Croatian Frost Patty out there. Maybe a few, actually. Better watch where you step!
Croatian Frost Patty by Curtis Claymore April 15, 2025
Chinese Dog Paddle
When a person is doing their partner from behind, goes to slap their partner's ass, misses, and strikes them on the back of the head instead.
Bro, it was awful. I was having such a good time that I went for an ass slap and ended with a Chinese Dog Paddle. ...Hey, bro, where you going?
Chinese Dog Paddle by Curtis Claymore April 15, 2025
Chicago Freestyle Bandit
Bro, I had like six liters of beer before we got to it. I had to go so bad, I accidentally became the Chicago Freestyle Bandit. I wonder if she'll want to see me again.
Chicago Freestyle Bandit by Curtis Claymore April 15, 2025
Cartesian Cesspit
Bro, I hate to admit it, but she was my first time, and I accidentally pulled a full Cartesian Cesspit on her. I'm so ashamed.
Cartesian Cesspit by Curtis Claymore April 15, 2025