scalping

1. The process of removing the human scalp from the skull, usually performed by a ticked off native.

3. Buying tickets with the intention of selling them at a later date closer to the event.

1. "Magua got tomahawked for scalping Uncas and throwing him off a cliff."
2. "I feel like going scalping, I have plenty of tickets for good seats at the public execution."

by Braveheart's thirst for blood August 20, 2006

pseudo-random

Describing a sequence of numbers generated by a deterministic computer that is seemingly random, but eventually repeats. Good pseudo-random number generators have very long periods before the sequence repeats.

The date Easter falls on is pseudo-random in that it cannot be predicted off the top of someone's head, and it takes 5.7 million years for the sequence to repeat.

To generate a pseudo-random number in C, you'd use the Rand(); function.

by Braveheart's thirst for blood April 01, 2007

whopper patch

A transdermal patch in a Burger King commercial that enables the wearer to resist the craving for a Whopper.

Narrator:It's been many hours of staring for these people in the staring contest. Now we bring in the Whopper to see who wins.
::places Whopper in between the two people staring at each other::
::Person 1 looks away and eats the whopper::
::Person 2 rolls up his sleeve to show the Whopper Patch::
Person 1:"Whopper patch!!?? That's not fair!!"

by Braveheart's thirst for blood March 24, 2007

Death++

A mythical programming language, similar to C++, where you describe in a text file how you want someone to die, usually in a gruesome way, and the compiler 3D renders a video file of the death complete with blood and guts. A game which I wish they would make but the do-gooders won't allow it because they think it will make kids go on killing sprees.

--sample Death++ code:--
/* mayandrink.dpp Mayan Sacrifice */
#include <athame.h>
#include <goblet.h>

create(victim1);
Standup(victim1);
SlitThroat(victim1,athame1,1,1){
while throat(victim1) not bleeding{
waitVblankStart()/* wait for blood to start oozing out */
}
}
while throat(victim1) bleeding and goblet not full{
goblet.place(underthroat) /*catch the blood in the goblet */
}
/* the grand finale! drinking the human blood! */
goblet.drink(self,GOBLET_CAPACITY);
end();

Lamer1: "I'm bored, lets play the game Dance Dance Revolution:Skyclad Forest Edition!"
Man1: "Naw, let's make a Mayan Sacrifice Ritual video in Death++!"

by Braveheart's thirst for blood March 24, 2007

MTBF

1. In machines, the amount of time, when operating a bank of machines, between any one of them failing. Not lifetime, as hard drive manufacturers want you to think. It is the average amount of time between failures of indivdual parts when talking about a system.

2. In biology, the average lifespan of each individual organism which has a particular set of genes or "environment of luck". An "environment of luck" can be something like all people who fly on a plane, living around individuals who want you dead in the worst way,all people who smoke, or some other demographic.

1. When punching laced cards on a bank of keypunch punched-card makers, the average MTBF is about three cards.
1. In an average house, it is normal to burn out 3 incandescent light bulbs in a month. Therfore the MTBF is 10 days.
2. Teacher:"King tut only lived to be 19."
Mocking Student:"Wow, his MTBF is in the toilet!"
2. "The MTBF of John Benet Ramsey is quite short."

by Braveheart's thirst for blood August 20, 2006

Mohammed Mohammed Mohammed

Some guy's real name. It's a valid string for a man of an Arabian/Middle Eastern name, having the first name Mohammed, the middle name Mohammed, and the surname (last name) Mohammed. Also the most popular boys name in the entire world when you use the first name only. Mohammed M. Mohammed would be the way to say it with the middle initial.

I met this 3-1/2 foot tall guy with a black beard and turban who calls himself Mohammed Mohammed Mohammed and I picked him up, cuddled him in my arms and felt the wiry hairs on his chin.

by Braveheart's thirst for blood March 24, 2007

sakar

A corporation whose technological feats include a wireless mouse that jumps 400+ pixels at random times along with a 3.1 megapixel digital camera whose battery life with 3 freshly charged AAA cells lasts a gogol times longer (give or take 50%) than a celebrity marriage (the batteries last approximately 10 minutes). Approximate synonym: Chinktronics.

I went to drag a MP3 file to my iPod, but it fell in the Recycle Bin instead, darn Sakar mouse!

At least the battery life on my Sakar digital camera is long enough for Lindsay Lohan's wedding pictures.

by Braveheart's thirst for blood July 20, 2007