A city in coastal Northern California that has the foggiest, coldest, most disappointing summers in all the United States. 68 degrees is considered a heat wave there.
Tourist: I've been here for a week in mid-July and it's only reached 58 degrees, and I haven't seen the sun once or got a clear view of the redwoods. I'm sick of this darned jacket! When is it ever nice here?
Resident # 1: Here in Eureka it's cold and foggy all summer long, but if you like the sun, drive 30 minutes inland, where it's a toasty 100 degrees.
Resident # 2: When it reaches 75 in Eureka, our older residents die of heatstroke.
Resident # 1: Here in Eureka it's cold and foggy all summer long, but if you like the sun, drive 30 minutes inland, where it's a toasty 100 degrees.
Resident # 2: When it reaches 75 in Eureka, our older residents die of heatstroke.
by Boxcar Bob October 26, 2006
A medicine, often advertised on TV commercials as revolutionary, that is known to cause more problems than it cures.
TV Commercial for Allerelieva (antimedicine):
It's pollen season, so when you're suffering with allergies, you need the new Allerelieva!
(Beautiful music plays, happy people shown dancing)
This revolutionary new formula will rejuvenate you and get you through those warm spring days allergy free!
(Spectacular nature scenes shown)
But Allerelieva is not for everyone! Side effects may include sore throat, runny nose, fever, coughing, shortness of breath, seizures, and death.
(Relaxing music continues to play, people shown enjoying gorgeous mountains)
If you suffer with allergies, consult your physician now to see if Allerelieva is right for you.
It's pollen season, so when you're suffering with allergies, you need the new Allerelieva!
(Beautiful music plays, happy people shown dancing)
This revolutionary new formula will rejuvenate you and get you through those warm spring days allergy free!
(Spectacular nature scenes shown)
But Allerelieva is not for everyone! Side effects may include sore throat, runny nose, fever, coughing, shortness of breath, seizures, and death.
(Relaxing music continues to play, people shown enjoying gorgeous mountains)
If you suffer with allergies, consult your physician now to see if Allerelieva is right for you.
by Boxcar Bob March 25, 2007
A virus related to COVID-19 that affects both sides of the political spectrum. Symptoms are either intense overreaction or extreme ignorance.
Moronavirus patient #1: How dare you step outside your house. We need to keep locked down until we find a vaccine.
Response: Really? Do you realize over 25% of the population could die from poverty, stress, or suicide if we do that?
Moronavirus patient #2: COVID-19 is a hoax. Let's go out and party, party, party.
Response: What's wrong with you? My friend died of COVID-19. Do you want to keep us shut down forever and get orher people sick?
Response: Really? Do you realize over 25% of the population could die from poverty, stress, or suicide if we do that?
Moronavirus patient #2: COVID-19 is a hoax. Let's go out and party, party, party.
Response: What's wrong with you? My friend died of COVID-19. Do you want to keep us shut down forever and get orher people sick?
by Boxcar Bob May 27, 2020
A bird who never sleeps, imitates other birds and animals, car horns, and whatnot, and doesn't shut up all night long, just because it is looking for a mate.
They can be recognized by their song: 'Chirrup chirrup chirrup tweet tweet tweet beep beep beep twirrup twirrup twirrup weet weet weet honk honk honk cheep cheep cheep bereep bereep bereep ...'
They can be recognized by their song: 'Chirrup chirrup chirrup tweet tweet tweet beep beep beep twirrup twirrup twirrup weet weet weet honk honk honk cheep cheep cheep bereep bereep bereep ...'
After being kept awake for 10 nights by the non-stop singing of the stupid mockingbird in the tree outside my bedroom, I lit up a stick of dynamite to blow up the tree and kill the annoying critter for good.
by Boxcar Bob November 05, 2006
Covetous Broadcasting System. So called because they require large fees from cable and satellite companies to air their channels. If these companies refuse to pay their ridiculous fees, CBS will black their channel out until they pay the greedy snobs their insane prices. They have done this before to Dish and now to DirecTV.
Also they will move their most popular programs to CBS All Access, which costs extra money to watch programs online even if you do have their regular channel.
Also they will move their most popular programs to CBS All Access, which costs extra money to watch programs online even if you do have their regular channel.
CBS, the Covetous Broadcasting System has lost many viewers due to their blackouts and extra fees, but they have not learned their lesson.
by Boxcar Bob July 25, 2019
A mortgage company whose Internet ads are so annoying, intrusive, some almost criminally insane, that they actually produce the opposite effect of what they are meant to accomplish: loss of business and customers.
Person 1: When I go to Yahoo, I sometimes have to refresh the page 4 or 5 times before I can concentrate.
Person 2: Must be those ads from lowermybills.com.
Person 1: Right! From ugly 30-foot-long dogs, to sexually explicit animations, to irritating dancing silhouttes, I just want to make one animation with all their ad designers being blown off a cliff.
Person 2: Must be those ads from lowermybills.com.
Person 1: Right! From ugly 30-foot-long dogs, to sexually explicit animations, to irritating dancing silhouttes, I just want to make one animation with all their ad designers being blown off a cliff.
by Boxcar Bob November 22, 2006
A device which insecure people waste money on because they are afraid their sacred, shiny cars will be stolen. Since about 99.9% of car alarms are false alarms, however, the owners eventually forget why they got the alarm in the first place, and get used to their cars crying wolf after a few occurrences.
Occasionally this will encourage angry neighbors to do whatever they can to put themselves and these useless devices out of their misery. This may include vandalizing the offending cars until they can disarm the screeching, honking, blaring whiners. Therefore, car alarms actually lead to more damage than good, and are one of the most foolish inventions in the history of mankind.
Occasionally this will encourage angry neighbors to do whatever they can to put themselves and these useless devices out of their misery. This may include vandalizing the offending cars until they can disarm the screeching, honking, blaring whiners. Therefore, car alarms actually lead to more damage than good, and are one of the most foolish inventions in the history of mankind.
For the fiftieth time in two weeks, the car alarm went off triggered by a bird who perched itself on the trunk, which caused a neighbor to get a baton and whack the offending automobile until he was able to get to the alarm and break it in two. Five minutes later, as the commercial break arrived during the action thriller movie, the car owner came out. Suddenly he realized that the alarm he had originally came to stop was no longer blaring away. He then saw the damage to his precious luxury and fainted.
by Boxcar Bob February 24, 2008