Charles-“man I sure am hungry, got anything to eat Alex?”
Alex-“HOW ABOUT SOME HAGGISSTUFFEDPUSSY?”
Charles-“AAAAAAAAH”
*fucking dies”
Alex-“HOW ABOUT SOME HAGGISSTUFFEDPUSSY?”
Charles-“AAAAAAAAH”
*fucking dies”
by Alex’s Urban dick July 22, 2022
Stock market got you confused? DO NOT fear sexvestments are here. Ight so like sexvestments are when you invest in a sexual activity which has a chance of making you money. If I sleep with someone and rob them of all their valuables, that’s a sexvestment.
Eli- “man I need some money :(“
Jimbo-“just make a good sexvestment”
Eli-“???”
Jimbo-“Ight so I got my dick wet with this 78 y/o, she’s like a millionaire or sum but wrinkly and horny, it was a risky sexvestment but I came out of it with a whole lotta dough”
Eli-“that’s genius, not sick and twisted in the slightest!!”
*clapping*
Jimbo-“just make a good sexvestment”
Eli-“???”
Jimbo-“Ight so I got my dick wet with this 78 y/o, she’s like a millionaire or sum but wrinkly and horny, it was a risky sexvestment but I came out of it with a whole lotta dough”
Eli-“that’s genius, not sick and twisted in the slightest!!”
*clapping*
by Alex’s Urban dick July 21, 2022
Kai-“man I wish I could be SWAG and GAY at the same time :(“
Eli-“BUT TOU CAN!”
Dino-“yeah Eli’s right, just be a swaggot”
Kai-“:O”
Eli-“BUT TOU CAN!”
Dino-“yeah Eli’s right, just be a swaggot”
Kai-“:O”
by Alex’s Urban dick July 22, 2022
Alex-“wow Dino that was a Fannytastic batch of cookies”
Dino-“yeah but you wanna know what’s better than cookies?”
-to be continued
Dino-“yeah but you wanna know what’s better than cookies?”
-to be continued
by Alex’s Urban dick July 21, 2022
Holy moly guacamole is your hotdog wideeeeeeee? That’s okay. We present a condome! It’s pretty much just like a really wide condom.
Gejs-“man it sure sucks having such a fat juicy dick if only I could find something wide enough to hold my gargantuan genitalia and protect me from S T D S”
Dino-“do not fear condome is here, that elephant trunk of yours will be P R O T E C T E D!!”
Dino-“do not fear condome is here, that elephant trunk of yours will be P R O T E C T E D!!”
by Alex’s Urban dick July 21, 2022
So pretty much a sexagon be like 6 homies sexing out but like it’s really hardcore and there’s six of them
Dino- “hey Alex wanna join me and Eli’s sexagon we need like 3 more people tho”
Alex- “nah I’m a mega virgin (business man) I don’t have time for an intense passion filled sex sesh with the homies, sorry bro”
Alex- “nah I’m a mega virgin (business man) I don’t have time for an intense passion filled sex sesh with the homies, sorry bro”
by Alex’s Urban dick July 21, 2022
So you’ve got two names Jim and Tim (for short) now one can be extended to Timothy however the other cannot? Behold jimothy
Dino-“yo I found this baby”
Jimbo-“name it Timothy”
Edwin-“no! Name it jim!!!”
Alex- “timothy + jim = jimothy”
*clapping*
Jimbo-“name it Timothy”
Edwin-“no! Name it jim!!!”
Alex- “timothy + jim = jimothy”
*clapping*
by Alex’s Urban dick July 21, 2022