☆★Midas★☆'s definitions

My name is...

Walter Hartwell White, I live at 308 negra arroyo lane albequerque New Mexico 87104, I have recently smuggled methanphetamine from across the United States. I have a drug problem consisting of where I FAP to my daughter's selfies, I also have attachment issues with my wife so I hot glued my penis inside her. I also broke into your house and stole your wallet, I also broke into your child's bedroom and proceeded to then masturbate to his 'sextapes' he makes on his Nintendo 3DS at 12 am. All while twerking on his nose, I also broke into Alcatraz and fucked a dead corpse, which was actually a corroded stripping pole in Handurez, speaking of Mexico, I have shipped your wife to Argentina, where she will get a BDSM session for exactly 48 hours straight.

My name is... big fat mama llama.

by ☆★Midas★☆ March 27, 2022

niggalovania

Black sans, you may call me racist because im white, but if you're white, you had to type the n word to get here. ^o^ Lol

You: Im GoNnA tYpE nIgGaLoVaNiA On UrBaN dIcTiOnArY aNd CaLl SoMe OnE oUt FoR iT.

Me: Lol you racist

by ☆★Midas★☆ February 3, 2022

If your girlfriend has...

...a scar on her right eye.
One golden left eye.
Has black hair.
Is pale as can fucking be.
and has nice breasts and a good 2 inch cleavage...
That's not your girlfriend
Thats my fucking wife... Marigold.

Jules: Hey dad look, I'm lesbian!
Me: THATS A SIN! GIVE ME THAT OR ELSE GOD WILL FUCKING SEND YOU TO HELL!
Me: Oh, some nice tits.

Wait... If your girlfriend has...
WAIT THAT'S YOUR MOM
Jules: Lgbtqia+
Me: The I stands for incest...

Jules: DAD WAIT...
Me: *Strips her*
Jules: Oh daddy please no oh my god not again daddy wait hol o- OOoOoOoooOhhhh. AhhhhhHaAAA Oh daddy harder ohhhh. Stick- OooooOOOOooOaaaaahHH

Me: *cums*

by ☆★Midas★☆ January 31, 2022

Ford Dodge

A car many people own but 98% of the dodges you see are either being sheltered in or are trashed as fuck.

Han: Hey I have a ford dodge.
Henos: Poor ass

by ☆★Midas★☆ January 24, 2022

Mick and Rorty

Ok you ever read that book of captain underpants where they went to an alternate world? Yeah, like that, so, there is this dumbass scientist who sucks shit at alchemy and other things that reqiure at least 1 brain cell. And this smartass fucktard who has to follow this white wigga down the road as a human shield.

Dude 69: Hey dudes lets watch frick and morty!
Dude 420: No i like mick and rorty R-tard!

by ☆★Midas★☆ January 10, 2022

Dickhole daddy

Someone who has aids and has a dude inside his pee-hole.

“Hello! Dickhole daddy!”
Dickhole daddy: “hello!”

by ☆★Midas★☆ August 2, 2023

Wish-Wosh

The act of gaining a sexy lassie's trust only to give'r the ol' "quarter pounder with balls".

Jules: Dad, have you seen my phone?
Me: Come in my room, it might be anywhere...
Jules: Ok!
Later...
(Muffled) Dad stop i'm only 15.
Me: That's what she said, and that's what you're 'bout to say soon...
Jules: What?
Me: *lip bites naughtily*
Jules: OoooOooOOOooh daddy yes! Give it to me! Gimme the ol' wish-wosh

by ☆★Midas★☆ February 7, 2022