Pterodactyl543

The guy on urban dictionary who just got his posts up.
Otherwise known as me.

Dude 1: Hey wanna see livepool?
Dude 2: Hey wanna go on urbandictionary.com and see Pterodactyl543?
Dude 1: Yea

by ☆★Midas★☆ January 11, 2022

mega brain fart

When you have the motivation to do something useful after work, only for you to sit down and play video games and whine about how little time you have to do something useful every day.

Negrito: I know I said I’d do it after work, but I’m tired right now and I think I deserve to nap.
George: What the mega brain fart was that? Get up and do the dishes, laundry, cooking, plumbing, lighting, cleaning, kitchen, bathroom, and universe right now young man.
Negrito: *depressed*

by ☆★Midas★☆ February 21, 2024

Quickie Dickie

When you fuck someone for a few seconds but you already cum.

Quickie dickie time…

by ☆★Midas★☆ July 28, 2023

If your girlfriend has...

...a scar on her right eye.
One golden left eye.
Has black hair.
Is pale as can fucking be.
and has nice breasts and a good 2 inch cleavage...
That's not your girlfriend
Thats my fucking wife... Marigold.

Jules: Hey dad look, I'm lesbian!
Me: THATS A SIN! GIVE ME THAT OR ELSE GOD WILL FUCKING SEND YOU TO HELL!
Me: Oh, some nice tits.

Wait... If your girlfriend has...
WAIT THAT'S YOUR MOM
Jules: Lgbtqia+
Me: The I stands for incest...

Jules: DAD WAIT...
Me: *Strips her*
Jules: Oh daddy please no oh my god not again daddy wait hol o- OOoOoOoooOhhhh. AhhhhhHaAAA Oh daddy harder ohhhh. Stick- OooooOOOOooOaaaaahHH

Me: *cums*

by ☆★Midas★☆ February 01, 2022