Skip to main content

veloscillator 

Combination of velocity and oscillator. Used to describe a driver on the same road as you, usually a lonely highway. You're traveling at a constant rate of speed, but that other jerk will go a little faster than you, pass you, and you'll be rid of him...but then he decides he's going too fast and lets off on his gas...then his car slowly makes his way back to you, and you pass him...then he speeds up and passes you...and then slows down....and over and over again. Usually ends up with you flooring your accelerator and putting so much distance between you that he can never catch up. Usually an old person, or someone from up north whose mind doesn't work quite right.
Me, to wife: What the hell is that guy doing?
Wife: Who?
Me: That douche right there. I passed his slow ass two miles back and he's crept up on me...now he's passing me. Why does he keep changing speeds? He's a veloscillator!
Wife: Don't let it eat you up inside. Put some love in your heart.
Me: NOW what is he doing? He's slowed down and I have to look at his dumb face again!
Wife: Well, he's behind you now. You sure are handsome.
Me: Look at him! Now he's passing me! Is he in love with me? Is my profile that awesome??!?!
Wife: Well, actually it is. He might have a crush on you.
Me: LOOK AT THIS GUY! Now I've passed him....I'm so sick of this shit! VRRROOOOOMMM.....let's see this asshole catch me now!
veloscillator by Greyborzoi July 31, 2009
veloscillator mug front
Get the veloscillator mug.
See more merch

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility
I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.
sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019
Related Words

Breadhead 

Someone who is addicted to obtaining money and building wealth. A money addict and fanatic. Breadheads often work more than one full-time job, and some even participate in illicit activities to "obtain the bread".
A breadhead is like a crackhead, but for money instead of crack.
Breadhead by 🅱️ U S 3 4 8 March 30, 2022

Stink lines

As seen in illustrations or cartoons: Wavy, vertical lines rising above a person, place or thing. Denotes a foul odor.
"You didn't put enough stink lines on your picture of the teacher."
Stink lines by Athene Airheart March 14, 2004

schmegegge 

Yiddish slang word meaning bullshit, baloney, hogwash, nonsense, crock of shit or hot air.
I don't buy the schmegegge about Morty sleeping with Moira.
His version of the story was pure schmegegge.
The whole schmegegge was made up to get Liz a little bit of attention.
schmegegge by budsbabe February 1, 2008

eye bleach 

Looking or experiencing something nice after witnessing something horrid like a disgusting gif or a disturbing video. Typically used as eye bleach are nice images of whatever makes the disturbed person happy.
"Bleach my eyes! Why is that woman's face ripped off!?"
*Looks up images of puppies and kittens.*
"That's good eye bleach."
eye bleach by Rini2012 November 29, 2016
Noun. Portmanteau of "street" and "road": it describes a street, er, road, built for high speed, but with multiple access points. Excessive width is a common feature. A common feature in suburbia, especially along commercial strips. Unsafe at any speed, their extreme width and straightness paradoxically induces speeding. Somewhat more neutral than synonymous traffic sewer.
Did you see what the traffic engineers want to do to our street? They're going to turn it into a total stroad!
Stroad by hammersklavier February 21, 2012