turtle bait 

Any powerful concoction of laxatives. Referring to the similarity in image of a turtle slowly sticking its head out of its shell to the image of stool slowly starting to exit the anus in a constipated individual. Also in reference to the following analogy to constipation, "The turtle's poking his head out but that's all I can muster." Turtle bait thus encourages defecation.

Setting: A hospital service that commonly deals with constipation.

Doctor 1: He's had a lot of morphine, and I think it's causing him to get constipated. No bowel movements for 5 days.

Doctor 2: I think a little TURTLE BAIT would help. Write orders for colace, miralax, metamucil, mag citrate, and if that doesn't work, an ox bile enema.

turtle bait by Bocephalus August 4, 2006

Turtle-Baiter

The act of masturbating whilst your busting for a shit so bad it's "Turtle Necking" out of your asshole

"Mate, Gary said he had a Turtle-Baiter in bed last night and he got some on the sheets"

Turtle-Baiter by Flabanaga Noongah July 14, 2024

Turtlebitch 

A person who has Turtle Beach headphones and doesn't mute their mic for background noise.

"That person is annoying the crap out of me with all that background noise. He is being such a Turtlebitch"

Turtlebitch by MuteRu October 9, 2011

turtlebation 

Turtlebation is the disgusting practise of masturbating turtles for sexual gratification.

Enos, a dwarf albino hunchback, practised turtlebation openly, until he was strung up by a lynch mob for his perversion.

turtlebation by scodder April 9, 2010