A phrase used to describe that awkward moment when you have to dump so bad that the poop has actually exited your anus and is toucing your tighty whitey Hanes cotton underwear.

Andy: Hey Floyd, you gotta pull over. I have to take a dump.
Floyd: Can't you wait 10 more minutes!! We're almost there.
Andy: No Floyd, I can't wait!! I'm touchin' cotton!!!

touchin' cotton by Twist Weeblow August 26, 2007

Related Words

trouchi • touching cloth • troughing • Touching • Touching Grass • touching tips • Trouche • Touching Cotton • Touchin • touchin' cotton

Touching tips

A well-guarded secret greeting amongst men that may only occur in the absence of women. It is performed by pressing the tips of two penises together, head on, forming a straight veiny line. Verbal consent is strongly recommended and eye contact is not advised. Can be used to determine if a male is circumsided without creating an awkward or uncomfortable situation.

"Hello there fine Sir, interested in Touching Tips?"
"Of course, how could one turn down such a reasonable request."
*touches tips together*
"Perfect, but I couldn't help but notice that you're circumcised."
"What a keen and correct observation that you have made."

Touching tips by Fromundo June 20, 2016

Traffic Touching

A game in which you drive up next to another in traffic and touch the side of their car while still driving ahead.

"Oh dude, we'll totally do some traffic touching after work."

Traffic Touching by ImNotNobody February 8, 2015

touching fish

A work ethic based on laziness as protest against current work culture in which

high productivity is demanded without sufficient reward or incentive.

- Yo bro, where's Tony? He's been gone for 30 minutes...
- I think he's in the bathroom touching fish.

touching fish by Shizibizan January 19, 2021

Touching hats

The act of making love with one or more partners of any sex, referring to the touching of genitals

"So you remember the girl from last night? Well I took her home after and we were, uh, touching hats for a good two hours."

Touching hats by Sarg Pepper August 25, 2011

Stop touching kids

When you tell someone weird to stop touching kids

You: Hey Jeff

Jeff: Want to see the kids in my basement

You: stop touching kids

Stop touching kids by Findlay Rimmr August 30, 2020

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

A moment in time where you feel distinctly Chinese over all other things.

Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life by Sus Chad September 21, 2026

Word of the Day on September 25, 2026

crunchy

Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.

"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"

crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007

Word of the Day on September 24, 2026

Galantir

A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.

Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.

Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026

Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.

DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.

murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021

Word of the Day on September 22, 2026

Whale

In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.

"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."

Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020

Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.

Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.

Concrete cowboy by EugeneJohnson42000 March 16, 2024

Word of the Day on September 20, 2026