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hammacher schlemmer 

A magazine filled with hella expensive stuff no one would use in real life. The magazine was created for billionaires and rich, ass white people to spend the extra million dollars they find between their couch cushions on.
"Honey, pass me that Hammacher Schlemmer magazine," said Mark as he put on his gucci sunglasses.
hammacher schlemmer by RealSh*t September 25, 2013

Von Schlemmer 

A fictional character from the Sonic the Hedgehog animated series who enjoys staying in the cooler
Guy1:I went to get a soda and jeff jumped out of the cooler and scared the hell outta me

Guy2:Von Schlemmer?
Von Schlemmer by craz kylo May 23, 2008

schlemmer 

A man with low standards, who, in focusing on convenience over quality, will take whatever he can get.
"After finding out her boyfriend was a schlemmer, Chelsea demanded he get tested for VD."

schlemmer 

a man who takes advantage of very young, innocent women for his own sexual pleasure and cynical intellectual delight
She was in her early twenties, but very pure, having had only one boyfriend since she was seventeen. Not only a worldly man, but quite the schlemmer, he used his experience to take complete physical advantage of her...not to mention the emotional abuse he dealt.
schlemmer by RBWC November 17, 2003

Schemmerage 

When you hemorrhage a massive, custard like consistency, foul smelling feces in your pants
"After she had a burrito from Chipotle, she Schemmeraged her knickers"
Schemmerage by Shadow7979 October 2, 2017