When your significant other wants to have sex, but you are in the mood to do anything but that so you keep putting it off. Kind of like writing a paper that's due tomorrow. Chastity and/or Abstinence are synonyms.
Naw dude, you ain't going to get far. Shes procrastimating .
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.