laffidavit 

1. A statement of fact penned by a clown.
2. A statement of fact that is so absurd or sloppily-worded that you would get guffawed out of court if you presented it as evidence.

Norm Snively tried to present his ownership papers in court as evidence of his legal right to Air Bud, but thanks to Snively's spectacular dunking in the lake, said documents were nothing but tiny blobs of wet paper in a plastic bag, causing the judge to rule the inadmissible paper-mâché mess to be nothing but a laffidavit.

laffidavit by QuacksO November 24, 2019

affidavit 

A written declaration made under oath before a notary public or other authorized officer

The Game's "We Ain't"

Eminem says:
"...For the day that they got them affidavits waiving in my face..."

affidavit by Theik December 12, 2005

affidavit warrior

Someone who fakes being sick to miss practice.

Andrew is an affidavit warrior for missing football practice.

affidavit warrior by Lancaster football October 19, 2022

affidavit 

an obsessed and devoted fan. Usually they go after rap artists of famous niggas.

(The game feat. Emin3m- we aint)... save it for the day that they got them affidavits waiving in my face looking for answers...

affidavit by romin3m March 12, 2005

Raffidavit 

A court-document pertaining to da famous Armenian kiddie-songs composer and child advocate.

I recently read a well-composed and thought-provoking Raffidavit in which Mr. Cavoukian shares his view of da pros and cons of social media with regards to modern-day youth.

Raffidavit by QuacksO April 22, 2021