jesus take me to the playoffs

When you can’t make the playoffs in madden so you ask Jesus to take you to the playofffs after Jesus floats magesticly down naked and says “if you want to be taken to the play offs the play offs gotta be taken to you” and then you say ok Jesus do what you gotta do and then he says “ good cause I’m gonna FUCK YOU LIKE I FUCKED THAT PIG” *looks at pig * “oh my god it’s in half was it like that when you fucked it” Jesus says “no” then you ask “how long is it” then Jesus responds in a soft soothing voice “ longer than the pig”

I screamed jesus take me to the playoffs and then Jesus floated down and fucked me with a cock longer than a pig

jesus take me to the playoffs by Long john slider October 17, 2017

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SkyPesos

Delta SkyMiles, also known as SkyPesos, is the frequent flyer program of Delta Airlines. It has a very poor value and hard to use.

- I'm trying to book an award flight to Paris, but I only have 70,000 SkyPesos
- Just forget about it, you don't have enough SkyPesos to fly anywhere.

SkyPesos by 404_name_not_found December 6, 2018

Word of the Day on August 14, 2026

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Quiche Peanemis

Quirky niche peak cinema analysis
It describes the analysis of a media piece which is quirky and niche, yet peak.

Give me the quiche peanemis on the movie I missed.

Quiche Peanemis by Mushroom2241 June 17, 2026

Word of the Day on August 13, 2026

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Hate Draft

1. Select a player (real or fantasy) during a sports draft to spite or anger one or more of your opponents because they had intended to select him/her.

2. Select a player (real or fantasy) during a sport draft to put one or more of your opponents at a strategic disadvantage.

1. Billy hate drafted Chad OchoCinco because he knew Sam had wanted him since he is from Cincinnati. Billy already had plenty of players to fill that position but wanted to make sure Sam didn't get him.

2. Billy hate drafted Peyton Manning because he was the only good quarterback left and he knew Sam had been planning on drafting him.

Hate Draft by pffler September 1, 2009

Word of the Day on August 12, 2026

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jalopy

A shitty car

"I can pull James Bond stunts in a jalopy."

jalopy by watson November 20, 2002

Word of the Day on August 11, 2026

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Utility beer

Utility beer is the beer you keep around for the day-to-day moments when beer is a necessity to assist in pedestrian activities (golf, plumbing, yardwork, babysitting, staff meetings, Zoom calls). For the beer snob it is the beer you save for neighbors when they drop in at 3 p.m. on a Tuesday. It is differentiated from the actual high-end beer you save for special events, holidays, and special tastings.

Person 1: Dave, did you bring along those hazy craft IPA's so we could drink while cleaning Lyle's pool?
Person 2: Nope. I just have a bunch of utility beer that Steve dumped on me. Good enough for this. It is only 10:30 a.m.

Utility beer by lakeshore February 1, 2022

Word of the Day on August 10, 2026

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Oinking

Police activity, especially of the non-productive type i.e. The act of setting up and patrolling speed traps, harassing or arresting people based on appearance (racial profiling), breaking up parties, any sort of cannabis bust, etc.

"Did you see all the cops on highway 6? They are oinking hard!"

"I hope Johnny doesn't get caught with his bag of weed, the pigs are oinking"

Oinking by DontDrinkSoda June 29, 2013

Word of the Day on August 9, 2026

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