jackoff all trades

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An individual claiming proficiency for every task presenting itself, anywhere. He is neither schooled nor proficient beyond the ability to claim such.

An individual whose continued claims at ability are immediately discounted upon attempt.

"Dave says he'll fix my brakes, file my taxes, upgrade my computer, and save me a bundle! And he's gonna read my fortune, win Lisa back, and get me promoted!"

"Dude, Dave's an divorced, unemployed dog groomer. Don't let him touch your shit... Guy's a jackoff all trades."

jackoff all trades by 3sqzper January 5, 2009

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Jackoff all trades

"Dave says he'll fix my brakes, file my taxes, upgrade my computer, and save me a bundle! And he's gonna read my fortune, win Lisa back, and get me promoted!"

"Dude, Dave's a divorced, unemployed dog groomer. Don't let him touch your shit... Guy's a jackoff all trades."

Jackoff all trades by 3sqzper July 21, 2008

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Jackoff of all trades

Somebody who believes that they can multitask, but in attempting many different endeavors, fails at all or most of them. A failed polymath. An incompetent, wannabe rennaissance man.

"Dude thinks he's the jack of all trades. He screwed up the math on the cash register, he can't speak spanish for shit, and after he tried to tune up my car, I had to take it in and spend $200 bucks before it would start again. He's the jackoff of all trades."

Jackoff of all trades by Hank the Monster October 18, 2009

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Jack off all trades

A dilettante with tools; someone who thinks they can fix lots of things, but actually hacks the job. A homeowner who tries to handle all aspects of home repair, but has no skills.

Also used as a verb.

Noun: Bob really spends a lot of time on projects, but nothing works. He's a Jack off all trades.

Verb: I just like buy all the best tools, but really I just jack off all trades.

Jack off all trades by clayshingle February 13, 2010

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Jack off all Trades

Someone who's so easy to get in bed with, they'll jack you off for basically anything.

"Jared's a total Jack off all Trades, I said I'd get him McDonalds if he blew me, and man did he enjoy those McNuggets."

Jack off all Trades by ToastonBeans April 12, 2023

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Jack off all trades

A person who does not use profession as criteria for choosing sexual partners

- How'd you swing that? I thought Jane only fucked above a certain income bracket.

Naa man, she's a jack off all trades

Jack off all trades by michaelstripe December 12, 2007

Word of the Day on February 12, 2010

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Soul digger

A man who dates women with the sole purpose of exploiting their time, energy, and labor while he sucks the joy and happiness from their lives.

"That guy's a soul digger. He'll expect you to work full time, but you'll be doing all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, shopping, and childcare while he plays video games or watches TV."

Soul digger by anonymous November 11, 2026

Word of the Day on November 11, 2026

pod person

A person pretending to be something they aren't, or an impostor. This is inferred because of the old alien movies where alien pods appear on earth and the "pod people" dispose of the humans and slowly reproduce the bodies, pretending to be humans.

The pod person was pretending to be my father, but I knew that he was an alien when he acted differently than my father ever would have.

pod person by Christopher M. May 9, 2005

Word of the Day on November 10, 2026

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dead drop

A dead drop is a location used to secretly pass items between two people, without requiring them to meet.

Spies have been known to use dead drops, using various techniques to hide the items and to signal that the drop has been made. Drug dealers use this as well.

A common place is to duct tape the item to the underside of a toilet cover in a public restroom.

A signal is sometimes used as well to indicate there is something to pickup, like a pile of stones in a certain formation. After checking the drop the signal is removed.

"The dead drop is the restroom toilet at the Gulf station at the corner of Commercial Ave. and Georges Rd."

dead drop by rubberroom July 23, 2008

Word of the Day on November 9, 2026

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No Surprises Wedding

A "No Surprises Wedding," or NSW, is a wedding invitation designation that tells attendees that there can be no unplanned announcements, engagements, events or speeches at the wedding - all actions must be pre-approved by the couple. Anyone who performs an unapproved "surprise" will be asked to leave the wedding early.

This designation comes from Reddit, where so many stories of bad wedding behavior indicated a need to communicate expectations for the wedding behavior of attendees.

You are cordially invited to the nuptials of Brian and Tom on October 31 at noon.

Please note that this wedding is child-free (under 10) and a No Surprises Wedding (NSW). Reach out to wedding planner Sami Smith to request approvals or exceptions; please note that exceptions will be rare. Limited child care for under-10s will be available. All approvals will be noted and included in planning. Unapproved, or surprise exceptions, will result in guests being asked to leave.

No Surprises Wedding by dbdefenestrate August 27, 2023

Word of the Day on November 8, 2026

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ulzzang

Ulzzang true definition is "best & "face" = best face in korean. They are basically people with above average looks, sometimes with the use of photoshop and haduri who post their pics online, some becoming internet celebrities.

"Hey, see that chick over there? She's pretty enough to be an ulzzang. :D"

ulzzang by `r i k kit t y February 26, 2008

Word of the Day on November 7, 2026

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