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donkey touch 

A derogatory football term based largely in the area of banbridge and loughbrickland in northern ireland, when someones first touch of a football is very poor, you must immediately turn and shout at them, that they have a donkey touch!
Paul: *miscontrols ball*
David: fuck sake paul that was such a Donkey Touch!
Paul: I donkey touched your mum last nite
David: interesting, but your still shite at football!
Craigy: *bursts out laughing*
donkey touch by Craigy! May 29, 2008
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donkey toucher 

One who touches donkeys, or is a lover of donkeys, petting and riding donkeys.

Also a girl who loves fucking large dicks. Can be a guy named Vlad.
Carol: Donkey touch last night?
Stacy: Hell yea! I wore that donkey out!

Jim: Did you take care of the animals?
Chris: What do I look like, a donkey toucher?
donkey toucher by Johnny Wanker February 17, 2014
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