clarinetist 

The most rockin' and chill people in a band. The most amazing kissers. And often use their clarinets to beat up the trumpet players after rehearsal!

Omg lisa! Gregg the clarinetist just kissed me!

The clarinetist just beat the crap out of the brass section!!!

clarinetist by Clarientworldzzz May 30, 2018

Clarinetist 

A cult of band nerds who are willing to fight the trumpets and steal their valve oil

Teacher: Clarinetists! Instruments up!

Clarinetist by cutmylipandstayalive June 9, 2019

Bass Clarinetist 

The most supreme badass in the band. The bass clarinetist quickly becomes bored with his own parts and begins to learn other parts, instead. By ear. After a few weeks, the bass clarinetist can be heard switching between different parts of the song at will, and just generally being showing up soprano clarinetists.

Why do we even play? The bass clarinetist knows our parts better than we do...

Bass Clarinetist by Antonymy July 14, 2011

Bass Clarinetist 

They seem all nice and friendly when in reality they want to beat your ass until you're black and blue. don't call it a saxophone or say anything closely related to a saxophone. They also get ignored by the band director constantly and are often missed when they have to play their part with the tubas. as consequence to the ban director, they do not play, they do not speak, they don't even finger. and they will only be recognized when they are not there that day.

"Tubas and bass clarinets play your part."
"The Bass Clarinet(s) isn't here sir."
"oh."
then he goes onto mark said bass clarinetist absent 30 minutes into the class.

Bass Clarinetist by MissGuts January 5, 2022

Clarineticorn 

A unicorn with a clarinet as a horn. one can be a clarineticorn by placing the bell of one's clarinet on their forehead and holding it there so that the rest of the clarinet sticks up like the horn of a unicorn. (usually done while running and/or making akward, loud noises)

Person 1: (running with their clarinet on their head) "AAAHH!!!"
Person 2: "dude, what's that guy doing"
Person 3: "oh he's just being a clarineticorn"

Clarineticorn by AAAHREALMONSTERS September 2, 2012

clarinets

pretty much the coolest sexiest most amazing talented people the world has ever known, also the most perfect godly section of the band

spectator: OMG!! you guys are amazingly awesome!

Clarinets: thats because we are the clarinets!

clarinets by clarinet geek January 27, 2009

Clarinetiquette

The art of practicing the clarinet without disturbing your neighbors.

The doofas upstairs played that fucking licorice stick all day and all night ... shitty clarinetiquette!

Clarinetiquette by TasteMonger November 17, 2017