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Census Man
One who enjoys numbers and statistics. Usually socially awkward.
Ability to sit in a cube for 9-10 hours with only the company of their database system. Can be identified by a nervous tic due to punching in numbers all day and talks to himself due to lack of social interaction. Wears glasses due to eye strain from computer monitors. Thinks pen holders in shirt pockets and 'Members Only' Jackets are cool.
An introvert, and sensitive man who looks good on paper but can't approach women successfully. Also loves surveys and puzzles. However, lacks basic life skills such as hunting, house repairs, and car maintenance.
Likely married, but how that happened is an unsolved mystery.
Ability to sit in a cube for 9-10 hours with only the company of their database system. Can be identified by a nervous tic due to punching in numbers all day and talks to himself due to lack of social interaction. Wears glasses due to eye strain from computer monitors. Thinks pen holders in shirt pockets and 'Members Only' Jackets are cool.
An introvert, and sensitive man who looks good on paper but can't approach women successfully. Also loves surveys and puzzles. However, lacks basic life skills such as hunting, house repairs, and car maintenance.
Likely married, but how that happened is an unsolved mystery.
Census Man by ComputersHateApostrophes June 15, 2009
Related Words
census christian
A person who claims to be a Christian but the only way anyone could tell is because the person is listed as 'christian' on a census. the person claims to be a Christian but lives in no way like one.
Ha! She's a Christian? More like a Census Christian! She lives without the slightest regard to anything Christianity is!
census christian by blambam June 16, 2010
Census Anger
Any anger arising from filling out a census form, whether due to aggravation by flatmates for humour, or otherwise.
Greg-You filled out your information on the wrong census form you idiot, you'll have to do it again
Chris Cross-God damn it. I have so much census anger
or
Higs-What is the internet number for the online census?
Greg-Its at the top of your form
Higs-No its not
Greg-Hahaha sucker
Higs-I am so census angry right now
Chris Cross-God damn it. I have so much census anger
or
Higs-What is the internet number for the online census?
Greg-Its at the top of your form
Higs-No its not
Greg-Hahaha sucker
Higs-I am so census angry right now
Census Anger by Chris Cross March 5, 2013
Census Rape
To edit someone's online census form while they are away from their computer with the hope they will submit it without seeing the changes.
Miller: Have you seen Charlie lately? I'm lost without him.
Mark: Haha, he got deported as 'cus I Census Raped him!
Everyone else in chorus: Hahahahahahaha, what a mug!
Miller: wha...
Mark: Haha, he got deported as 'cus I Census Raped him!
Everyone else in chorus: Hahahahahahaha, what a mug!
Miller: wha...
Census Rape by GrandMasterT May 16, 2011
Census announcer
Someone that talks about census results or something most people besides lawmakers don't pay much attention to in a mix of boxing, baseball, and horse racing terms. Soon they will have the Mexican sports announcers making this stuff sound exciting and interesting if too many people start to do it, and part of hell will break loose, which is concerning.
The city came out of the gate swinging on their census results and didn't quit until the census bureau was hesitant to send more investigators, since they kept getting beaten by residents. The census bureau got knocked out by the numbers, and the census announcer was there to keep everyone covered.
Census announcer by The Original Agahnim August 31, 2021
Major Census
A census enquiry by all the major governing bodies of the world It holds the statistical data of economic trends, goals, developments and means on the next coming era of mankind. Also refers to an unseen gaming entity AKA: Maj, whom inspires the online gaming community with his or her words. Some of the content which being is almost poetic.
1) The British government every few years does a "Major Census" on it's public and it's subjects. The system has been in use since the 13th century and is studied by elitist superpowers.
2) Doing a "Major Census" is related to an online glitch of disappearing into thin air / or going MIA, or is an indirect reference to the Doomsday book.
3) "SB Major Census" - watching from afar.
2) Doing a "Major Census" is related to an online glitch of disappearing into thin air / or going MIA, or is an indirect reference to the Doomsday book.
3) "SB Major Census" - watching from afar.
Major Census by Marquess Schimell October 15, 2006
More from Urban Dictionary
Respectfully
Precedes or follows either a gratuitously disrespectful or honest remark, originated in New York City. Used in similar fashion to "no offense" or "to be honest," interchangeably.
Ya mans is wild buns, respectfully. Respectfully he's washed.
After school, The Modells on Jamaica Ave was active. Respectfully.
After school, The Modells on Jamaica Ave was active. Respectfully.
Respectfully by john quan the first December 20, 2020
Word of the Day on September 26, 2026
You met me at a very Chinese time in my life
Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."
You met me at a very Chinese time in my life by Sus Chad September 21, 2026
Word of the Day on September 25, 2026
crunchy
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.
Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.
Modified derivative of granola.
Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.
Modified derivative of granola.
murderhobo
In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.
The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
Whale
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.
Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.
A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.
A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.