carpetlander 

One who "lands" a job in the cubicaled and carpeted higher ranks of a buissness or company after starting out at an entry level position.

Bill started working at the brewery five years ago, now that carpetlander is a sales rep!

carpetlander by JakeStar August 30, 2005

Carpetland 

A place of business which, despite its idyllic moniker, is staffed by many completely inept annoying passive-aggressive assholes, is open for way too many hours per day, and is basically just fucking Hell on Earth. A Carpetland employee is usually characterized by a complete lack of product knowledge, an inability to relate to other people in a way which is friendly or kind.

"I thought about going to Carpetland, but then I remembered my last visit there; I would rather have red-hot needles jabbed through my eyes and a red hot poker stuck up my ass."
"Man, I went to Carpetland, and the people were complete assholes. FUCK that place!"

Carpetland by That Dude That Knows September 23, 2020