Woodside Priory

They say that if you sniff your farts hard enough you'll be able to see it. You can't enter it unless you are driving either a Toyota Prius or a car with a market value of at lease 80K. Some people say it's just a legend but I know it's real. I know it's real cause I've been there. They say it's a college prep school ruled over by robed wizards but in reality it's a cleverly disguised waiting room for the rich brood of silicon valley. Not everyone believes it can be found. Well how could they. Only those with a Net worth of at least a couple million dollars can gain its attention and as the saying goes when you stare into the abyss the abyss stares back, unless you're poor. The mundane environment forces the future of the Bay Area to transform. The astral plane of ones mind turns gay, philosophically depleted, pedagalogically ignorant, hair blue, and fat. Also everyone there is hopped up on drugs. Warning to the wise. Avoid at all costs, otherwise it will cost you more than your wallet can handle.

Person A: I think we're lost
Person B: let me check (look of horror ensues)
Person A: What is it? You ok?
Person B: shit shit shit

Person A: What? (said in gay fat person voice)
Person B: It's Woodside Priory (also said in gay fat person voice)

by keithcage69 April 24, 2022

Woodside Priory

Woodside Priory is a college-prep school for 6-12. While the tuition is undeniably high, it is nowhere near the snob level of Menlo or even Castilleja. While Menlo and Castilleja are excellent academically and in terms of sports, the student body is mostly extremely rich. The Woodside Priory school pretty much accepts everybody, and it has a very diverse community including boarding students from all over the world. Priory is unusual in that it is a "nice" school- even the "quiet kids" or the "nerds" or the "losers" have friends. Teachers don't judge you based on your wealth or looks, same with students- everyone judges you on if you're nice or not pretty much. It's a good school with good academics, with graduates attending schools as prestigious as Harvard or Stanford. Famous for the five monks that live on campus, Woodside Priory is a catholic school that accepts people of all religions.

kid a at a public school: quiet, sitting alone, depressed
kid a at Woodside Priory: happy, friends, settled in
:)

by udocd November 5, 2010

Woodside Priory

Pretentious college prep school in silicon valley full of rich white kids who pay way too much for their weed. The weed's fucking terrible by the way. The school likes to think its diverse so they accept like 5 black kids and they even pride themselves on that. Look guys! Look how accepting we are! Look how diverse our student body is! Did I mention this school is absurdly expensive? Yeah 48K for day students and 60K for dormers. You'd think with all that money they get they could actually hire some competent teachers. But they don't. There's maybe like 5 good teachers out of the 30 they have. The rest should be kept 500 ft away from all schooling institutions. School is also insanely liberal but what do you expect? It's in silicon valley. But it's a vicious liberal echo chamber and this is coming from a liberal. You shoulda seen this school after election day. Not pretty. If I were to describe Woodside Priory with just one word, it'd be "ironic". They think they're so diverse with their five minorities that they boast about. It's a catholic school but everyone's a raging atheist. It's a school full of rich white kids but everyone's a liberal. It's a very expensive tuition that would imply class, but is so full of classless people.

I wasted 4+ years of my life and hundreds of thousands of dollars, smoked terrible pot that I paid way too much for, and was virtue signaled by an out of touch administration about diversity all at Woodside Priory.

by shutupsciencebitch September 29, 2017