An act of self-love wherein a fertile male places an upside down wastepaper basket over his erect penis and proceeds to release his emissions (ejaculate) into it
When you wake up before your alarm goes off, somehow make your mattress protector into a big lump on one side, and you question your whole life as a result.
After my tossy tossy turny turny since 3 this morning, my brain reached 9pm and turned itself off