Steve Jobs

Mediocre work by lazy assholes named Steve.
Serg: Why are these computers all fucked up?
Vic: Steve's the one that built them out.
Serg: Oh so they're all Steve Jobs.
by Dick Picker January 26, 2023
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Steve Jobs

A sexual move, similar to a handjob, on your wallet which leaves you both unsatisfied and broke.
Man, everyone in line at the Apple store for that new iPhone that added 10 pixels for $600 got Steve Jobs.
by SenselessNoise September 07, 2010
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Steve Jobs

Douchebag...no way around it, and he knows it.

Founded Apple by robbing another man who did all the work for him (Wozniak). The only reason he is so popular is because of his ultimate salesman persona, that allowed him to captivate and trick 3% of the general PC using public.

What people fail to realize is that the reason 98% of people use PC's is because most people like the idea of generosity, economic flexibility and freedom. Apple is none of these things, and the single BIGGEST Big-Brother company of all time.

Wozniak is the true genius behind Apple, a good man and a humanitarian, and Jobs robbed him. Wozniak himself was so disgusted with Jobs business policies that he gave his millions to a laid-off Apple employee and quit. He has yet to return, and I know he never will.

Bill Gates gives billions to charity. Linus made his platform free. Steve Jobs acts like he's high and fucking mighty because of his supposed 1$ salary. I CALL BULLSHIT ON THAT ONE.

TL:DR- Jobs is the ultimate self-inguldent douchebag of all time, and it is his policies and his policies alone that make Apple what it is. If you like overpriced technology that does less, bullshit customer service that robs you of buckets of money unfairly and want to be a part of the most elitist cult of all time, you have Steve Jobs to thank.
I don't need an example of Steve Jobs, enough has already been said.
by AboveTheIgnorance May 29, 2011
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Steve Jobs

Some prick who immediately thinks that he's God due to his oh-so-revolutionary iPod, and of which so much dumbasses follow and sneer at Gates, because your "mac" is better.
All the Mac dumbasses will start crying about this description of Steve Jobs and not publish this.
by OLOL January 15, 2007
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Steve Jobs

Officially the AntiChrist. The CEO and Co-founder of a company that is pure Evil bent on taking over the world.

Hence apple in latin is very similar to the word Evil in latin.
Steve Jobs: Mac computers are soo much more compatable than PCs

Mac Comp: WTF is this program you just gave me I can't read it, nor smell it!!
by ZZ1205 October 12, 2008
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Steve Jobs

The god of a cult. You have to sacrifice baby goats, while you wear a hat, and you throw it into a trash can. Steve Jobs will get it in the night and then he will feed your family.

Steve jobs is almighty and he FEEDS YOUR FAMILY!

All who aren't with steve jobs are fountain logic thinkers.
Steve Jobs is my life, and he gives me good food.
by Burninjoker December 17, 2010
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Steve Jobs

Born in 1955 (the same year as Bill Gates), Steve Jobs is the co-founder and charismatic CEO of Apple Inc. He is one of the greatest innovators of Silicon Valley. Steve Jobs led the creation of the Macintosh, which was the first stable computer to have a GUI and a mouse. Subsequently, he was fired from the very company that he founded and went on to found another computer company called NeXT. Due to a miscalculated market approach, NeXT computers flopped due to their high price. However, he had another company called Pixar, which became his comeback.

Apple invited him back in 1997 and bought NeXT to create a new operating system, which became Mac OSX. Steve Jobs led Apple Inc. to create many new and innovative products including the iMac, iPod, iPhone, Apple TV, etc.

Steve Jobs is known for his domineering personality, but is also known for his keen vision in the technological future. He also the lowest paid CEO in the world with an annual salary of $1.
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Steve Jobs: "Look, the Apple keyboard is not small enough. So instead of a regular QWERTY keyboard, I want to make it like a cell phone keypad, where each key has three letters."

Apple employees: "That's such a good idea, Steve! We're already getting good ideas. How about if we--"

Steve Jobs: "No! No! This is a stupid idea! You're all fired, you assholes! If I can't trust you to tell me when an idea is stupid, why are you here? Get out! Right now!"
by Jeongf January 29, 2008
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