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Slap the mayonnaise 

1. When a woman slaps her clitoris during the act of masturbation. Examples can be found in a variety of pornographic films, including (but not limited to) CLAM SLAPPERS volumes 1-62, DIVING IN OYSTERS volume 6, and DADDY, DON'T! volume 16. This move was popularized by Nina Hartley in the 1983 film, PINK CANOE. 2. When a male reaches an orgasm of prodigious proportions. For examples, see any Peter North film. 3. Preparing a sandwich with mayonnaise. 4. The act of patting one's head and belly at the same time. Considered impossible by some, there have been several people throughout the years who have been able to accomplish this feat. According to old world legends, those who are capable of this also possess the ability to see the future and to control the thoughts of minor mammals. 5. An all-purpose phrase that can be applied to any questionable action. RELATED FACTS: When this phrase is used, it is not uncommon to accompany it with a gesture familiar to those who have seen THE KARATE KID. Both arms are swept across one's chest in unison, back and forth in a slapping gesture.
1. "Dude! Look at her slap the mayonnaise!"
2. "I'm gonna' slap the mayonnaise all over you, baby."
3. "I think I'm going to slap the mayonnaise on a few slices of bread."
4. "Shit! I didn't know slapping the mayonnaise was so difficult!"
5. "I'ma slap the mayonnaise all over this hizzie!"
Slap the mayonnaise by Tusitala July 29, 2009
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