Skip to main content

Portuguese Comb Over

The Portuguese take on the classic Comb Over hairstyle popularized by the likes of billionaire douche bag Donald Trump, and Televangelist Con Artist/Huckster Benny Hinn.

The gag usually takes place at a Bachelor party in either Fall River or New Bedford MA, but you can certainly pull it off anywhere in the contiguous 48 States if a Portuguese whore is available.

After a night of serious gangbanging, a Portuguese whore's uterus is drained on the head of an unsuspecting party-goer that has passed out. The briny semen, mixed with the discharge from the whore's uterine pustules, is used as a styling gel.

The hair is swept dramatically over the top of the head and left to air dry. The now hardened sperm helmet, will bring hours of delight to the other party-goers.

The unsuspecting victim will eventually wake up from the horrendous Clorox Bleach smell, and he will automatically reach up to feel the hardened semen helmet and begin to vomit as he realizes he's been had. This is when you yell, "You're Fired!!"
George:
Henry got wicked drunk last night and didn't even screw the stripper.

Dave:
Henry's a known lightweight, did you fuck him up?

George:
We gave him a Portuguese Comb Over, and took pictures.

Dave:
That'll teach that asshole!!!
Portuguese Comb Over mug front
Get the Portuguese Comb Over mug.
See more merch
well known from south park
rednecks get angrry that future folk took there jobs so they yell
They took ouare jerbs!
Them future folk took ouare jerbs!
jerb by Jimberley Kim April 7, 2005
Word of the Day on May 22, 2026
An Irish phrase meaning shit, derived from ass
(Not to be confused with the literal description of one's buttocks)
"Did you hear the song Aylek$ dropped?"
"Hardly. Her music is absolute cheeks."

"My boyfriend say LaFlame is cheeks."
"Tell your boyfriend I said it's his mixtape that's cheeks."
Cheeks by thecartisan April 26, 2020
Word of the Day on May 21, 2026

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility
I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.
sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019
Word of the Day on May 20, 2026

Breadhead 

Someone who is addicted to obtaining money and building wealth. A money addict and fanatic. Breadheads often work more than one full-time job, and some even participate in illicit activities to "obtain the bread".
A breadhead is like a crackhead, but for money instead of crack.
Breadhead by 🅱️ U S 3 4 8 March 30, 2022
Word of the Day on May 19, 2026

Stink lines

As seen in illustrations or cartoons: Wavy, vertical lines rising above a person, place or thing. Denotes a foul odor.
"You didn't put enough stink lines on your picture of the teacher."
Stink lines by Athene Airheart March 14, 2004
Word of the Day on May 18, 2026

schmegegge 

Yiddish slang word meaning bullshit, baloney, hogwash, nonsense, crock of shit or hot air.
I don't buy the schmegegge about Morty sleeping with Moira.
His version of the story was pure schmegegge.
The whole schmegegge was made up to get Liz a little bit of attention.
schmegegge by budsbabe February 1, 2008
Word of the Day on May 16, 2026