Skip to main content

Masturbation Ninja 

One who can masturbate/masturbates everywhere they have gone/are without fear of being caught, with any object, without being seen, heard, or others having suspicion of the action of masturbation, any where, any time, and any place.
Student #1: Hey man, I whacked off in biology today.
Student #2: HOLY HELL! Did you get caught?
Student #1: Hell no I didn't, I am a freaking Masturbation Ninja.
----------
Guy #1: I jizzed all over my friends moms bra last night while he was in the same room.
Guy #2: What!? He didn't see you?
Guy #1: Shit no, he was sleeping.
Guy #2: Good thing you're a Masturbation Ninja.
Guy #1: Damn right.

Ninja Masturbating 

To covertly masturbate in the presence of others without their knowledge.
"At the bar I tried to listen intently to my friends at the table, but I was ninja masturbating and needed to finish off quickly."
Ninja Masturbating by ZombiUnikorn January 25, 2009

The masturbating ninja technique 

When a gentlemen decides to enter the masturbatory stage of his day, he may decide to deploy the homo sapien style (standing up) only to realize his t-shirt drops down into penile range. To avoid ejaculate or any lubratory means being transferred onto ones personnel, the ninja technique is engaged by whipping the front flap of the t-shirt over the head to create a warm, stylish, and protective measure against the army of unbelievable stickiness.
Policeman 1: "We found this fine young lad frozen to death here in the arctic tundra'.
Policeman 2: "It looks like he's been out here for weeks and missed the warm soothing touch of a woman, and decided to literally take matters into his own hands".
Policeman 1: "Correctomundo. If only he had a mentor to teach him the ways of the masturbating ninja technique, he might have pulled through".
Policeman 2: "Hey! Yeah that's true. If only he kept his shirt flipped over his head with his shoulders covered instead of taking it completely off, he'd still be here today".
Policeman 1: "Poor, poor, uninformed bastard".

Breadhead 

Someone who is addicted to obtaining money and building wealth. A money addict and fanatic. Breadheads often work more than one full-time job, and some even participate in illicit activities to "obtain the bread".
A breadhead is like a crackhead, but for money instead of crack.
Breadhead by 🅱️ U S 3 4 8 March 30, 2022

Stink lines

As seen in illustrations or cartoons: Wavy, vertical lines rising above a person, place or thing. Denotes a foul odor.
"You didn't put enough stink lines on your picture of the teacher."
Stink lines by Athene Airheart March 14, 2004

schmegegge 

Yiddish slang word meaning bullshit, baloney, hogwash, nonsense, crock of shit or hot air.
I don't buy the schmegegge about Morty sleeping with Moira.
His version of the story was pure schmegegge.
The whole schmegegge was made up to get Liz a little bit of attention.
schmegegge by budsbabe February 1, 2008