Kaufkins 

(noun) - a liberal atheist zealot living in the southern region of the United States, obsessed with Frank Zappa and controversial biologist Richard Dawkins. Likely to have a gambling problem and a disdain for restaurant managers. Can be identified by their cargo shorts and the facial-hair style of a Civil War deserter.

"Children, stay away from that Kaufkins - he's involved in devilry, and would rather part with his children than his poker winnings and craft beers."

"As the police officer approached the Kaufkins' vehicle in the parking lot of the concert venue, his pulse quickened at the thought of the tongue-lashing he was about to receive."

Kaufkins by LinusWolfe September 2, 2016