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Homeland Security

A federal agency established after 9/11/2001 to carry on the work of the terrorists. They help us fear nature by taking over FEMA and diverting funds that would have been spent on hurricane relief to equip meter maids with assault rifles. Constant reminders to "report suspicious behavior" to the police have made us fear each other and criminalized social anxiety disorder. Thanks to their fine efforts, being too shy to ask a girl for sex is now as likely to get you investigated as asking a girl for sex.
If you want to know why you feel insecure blame Homeland Security.
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homeland security

1) A strategic move on the part of the United States Government made to take away the rights guaranteed by the US Constitution and the Bill of Rights, and brought about by the 9-11 terrorist act, and the first step toward globalization of the planet resulting in the new world order, and a perpetual state of martial law in the new millennium.
see also- fucked, conspiracy, GW Bush, forced labor
homeland security by jrh5356 April 15, 2005

homeland security

All actions taken by national, state and local governments, by the private sector, and by individuals to prevent a terrorist attack from happening, to protect a target from being hit, to respond aggressively and appropriately once a target is hit, and to recover after an attack.
The national government spends 30 billion dollars a year on homeland security programs. It spends more than 300 billion on department of defense projects.
homeland security by Industry Pincer September 18, 2005

homeland security

When niggas defend their turf like your mom guarding a sandwich... honkey
Don't touch my fried chicken, I'll get all homeland security on yo ass...
homeland security by _ June 3, 2003

homeland security seagulls 

n., seagulls or robot seagulls that hang around on piers/pilings or where airplanes board looking for "suspicious activity". Work for the government. Fascists.
"Is that a real seagull on that railing?"
"Or is it a homeland security seagull?"
"Welcome to the police state."

Homeland Security Advisory System

a system of fear tactics to keep the uninformed, ignorant, and resistant masses under the government's control. The System is divided into 5 risk levels; Severe, High, elevated, guarded, and low. its rarely Low because there is WMDs and "insurgents" in Iraq. It is really convenient to raise the alert before a political event where there may be protestors-I mean terrorists.
The Homeland Security Advisory System was raised to orange August 1, 2004 weeks before the GOP convention.

Homeland Security Shitter 

An individual who is characterized by an inability, or strong reluctance, to have a bowel movement in any location outside the individual's home.
Why is Grandpa Phil in such a hurry to leave the dinner?

I think he's a Homeland Security Shitter - nature is calling after the turkey dinner but he won't go here so he's in a hurry to drive back to Montreal.
More from Urban Dictionary

trucker's tan 

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.
I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.
Word of the Day on October 5, 2026
The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys
Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!
kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025
Word of the Day on October 4, 2026
British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.
Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023
Word of the Day on October 3, 2026
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