Granola Gobbler

n. One who pursues the outdoors with unnecessary zeal.

* "Did you hear the cry of that rare native bird?"

"No, out of my way granola gobbler"

* "I need my $700 boots, walking poles, gaiters and goretex before I even think of walking up that hill."

"Hmm. You're a fucking granola gobbler"

* "Dude, nice polypropylene leggings. I didn't know you were such a granola gobbler"

* "Granola gobbler!"

by anonymous January 17, 2026