1. an individual who can frequently be seen slapping his own gooch
2. an individual who can frequently be seen slapping the gooch of another individual
Jim: Hey Taylor, you'll never who I just walked in on in the bathroom, slapping his own gooch!
Taylor: *gasp* Who?
Jim: Bob! I walked in to take a piss and there he was just standing in the stall with the door open, punishing his gooch!
Taylor: Wow... I never would have seen Bob as a gooch slapper...
Jim: I'm not sure if he saw me. I hope he didn't, I don't want him slappin' on my gooch.
When some resigns or retires from a job, they are on "eternity leave". This can also refer to someone who has passed away, especially someone who worked somewhere for a long time, retired/resigned, then passed away later.
Oh I'm sorry, you didn't know that Kelly is on eternity leave? She resigned and moved to Hawaii!
With regrets I would like to inform you that my boss is officially on eternity leave. I will never see or hear them again. Ever.