A Gilf Hunter is a carnivorous predator indigenous to filthy run down sports bars. The Gilf Hunter searches for his prey with a hawklike glare which puts a chill down your spine. The main staple of his diet are 50+ year old biker chicks with 4-6 teeth, horse hair, and a girth to rival the infamous
BT Lee. His only natural enemies in the wild, are pseudo-intellectual red-headed
fat ugly girls, who swear they are only virgins because they are waiting untill
college is over so they can concentrate on school. The Paradox is, that although they must make excuses for their permanent virginity, they have already been violated savagly by the Gilf Hunter which fuels their eternal quest for the
love and effection that he so wrongfully denied them. Another mystery which surrounds the ever-elusive Gilf Hunter is how he graduated from high school, took almost three years off, is in his 3 year of
college and is still only 17 years old.