Genius Bar

Apple's tech support station located in every Apple Store. Their specialties include:
- Run by minimum wage earning 18 year olds.
- Knows how to open Apple products and check the water damage indicators.

- If water damage indicators turn pink they charge you $1200 for a new motherboard and display. If not, they cannot fix the problem and they recommend you buy a new $2000 Macbook.

Customer: My Iphone X’s back glass is broken can you fix it?
Genius: Sure! I’ll be right back.
Genius: Unfortunately, we have to replace the entire motherboard, charging port, and camera because we fused the back glass to it.

Customer: Huh? Why did you guys design your phones in such a stupid way?
Genius: Because fuck you that’s why. Oh, and the repair will be $500 + Tax.

Customer: Well, I can’t be seen holding a cracked Iphone in front of my 3 friends so I must have the repair.

- Genius Bar staff

by Squag tentacles November 25, 2018

barroom genius

Someone who has the gift of bull****. Usually is the one at the bar that pretends to be an expert on a subject after reading one newspaper article on it. Usually is thought of as a "genius" by the surrounding drunks, who don't know any better.

John: Hey, did you hear what Sam had to say on that subject last night at the bar??

Mike: Are you kidding? That idiot is a barroom genius. The only people dazzled by him are the drunk fools that don't know any better.

by GiGi9339 April 26, 2010