Apple's tech support station located in every Apple Store. Their specialties include:
- Run by minimum wage earning 18 year olds.
- Knows how to open Apple products and check the water damage indicators.

- If water damage indicators turn pink they charge you $1200 for a new motherboard and display. If not, they cannot fix the problem and they recommend you buy a new $2000 Macbook.
Customer: My Iphone X’s back glass is broken can you fix it?
Genius: Sure! I’ll be right back.
Genius: Unfortunately, we have to replace the entire motherboard, charging port, and camera because we fused the back glass to it.

Customer: Huh? Why did you guys design your phones in such a stupid way?
Genius: Because fuck you that’s why. Oh, and the repair will be $500 + Tax.

Customer: Well, I can’t be seen holding a cracked Iphone in front of my 3 friends so I must have the repair.

- Genius Bar staff
by Squag tentacles November 25, 2018
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