fed-ex 

a male/dickhead who has been dumped who poses so small amount of assets alone that they can fit into a small package and be thrown out a window. Origins rooted in the divorce of Britney Spears and Kevin Federline (often referred to by his wigger name, K-fed)

Man 1: Dude I saw this bum in Malibu carrying a little cardboard box, and talkin like a wigger
Man 2: Yeah, man, me too. I think it was a fed-ex
Man 1: No, but this dude crazy, he was actin all ghetto and shit, but he made no sense. then he stood on the corner and started rappin bout some popozow shit-it made no sense
man 2: No shit, thats wat a fucking fed-ex does, he feeds off of rich people, and pretends he has talent while hoping nobody notices he doesn't

fed-ex by sexycatholic 666 December 1, 2006

Fed-Ex 

Happens when Britney Spears files for divorce with Kevin Federline K-Fed

Britney Fed-Ex (ed) last week.

Fed-Ex by Roadheat November 11, 2006

Fed-Ex 

Short for Federal Express. You know the postal service. I saw it on TV.

I'm going to send the package Fed-Ex.

Fed-Ex by Dave Greer November 16, 2006

fed-ex 

Mr Spears now that Britany Spears is divorcing his white trash ass.

Valentina: did you hear?!
me: about Dakota kicking Rockford's ass?! HELL YEAH! i was there!! cant WAIT to be there next year!!
Valentina: no. about K-Fed...or should i say FED-EX
me: yupp. Mr Spears is getting divorced AND his ass is getting kciked by John Cena on the first day of the new year!!

fed-ex by dakota cougarette November 29, 2006

Fed-ex 

Receiving fellatio from ones ex-girlfriend.

Couldn't close any girls on saturday night so had to call up sarah (ex-girlfriend) for some fed-ex.

Fed-ex by Protokol January 4, 2011

Fed-Ex 

When you put your package on an unsuspecting victim's shoulder.

A variation of tea bagging, but the perpetrator keeps his nutsack inside of his clothes.

"I Fed-ex-ed the shit outta Ray Ray's ho while she was passed on on the toilet last night!"

Fed-Ex by Myjohnsonsmagic December 18, 2008

Fed-Ex 

When you're fed up with your ex, or psycho-ex

She keeps threatening to tell my girlfriend about our ex sex, brah! I'm Fed-Ex.

Fed-Ex by catfight12 January 8, 2009