Fart Parenting is a method of parenting focusing on attachment and comfort. Either the mother or father of a new born baby will fart near their infant's face, with particular care to ensure the baby smells the fart. Each human has distinct and unique 'signatures' in the molecules of their farts and it's believed that when a baby is repetitively exposed to these fart molecules, they will feel comfort and bond with their parent. Fart Parenting involves each parent farting as often as possible in the face of their new born baby for a period of up to a year. It's important to keep exposing the child to the fart molecules for a year to form that strong, rich bond. Fart Parenting is part of a new wave of parenting methods among crunchy mommies, and promoted by groups like, Mères Sans Vaccins (Mothers Without Vaccines). Fart Parenting was nominated for a Long Grass award for Parenting Trend of the Year in 2016, but it lost out to the Bird Feeding Method.
I Fart Parented my triplets; Earthmoon, Atticus, and Felix-Lexus. They all loved my Fart Parenting and remember it fondly because I continued it until their 7th birthday with their breast feeding. Fart parenting promotes a healthy immune system that negates any need for toxic vaccinations.
by grassysally October 27, 2016
Get the Fart Parenting mug.The act of laying down a massive dirty stealthy fart before departing an event or gathering that will later engulf the lungs of your audience with your tasty airbourne fecal delight.
To sucessfully infect your chosen audience you must adhere to the following rules:
* A PF must be delivered silently.
* You must leave before the first of your victims becomes aware.
* You must wait until the stench has become one with the room before leaving (N.B. The hotter the fart the shorter the wait).
To sucessfully infect your chosen audience you must adhere to the following rules:
* A PF must be delivered silently.
* You must leave before the first of your victims becomes aware.
* You must wait until the stench has become one with the room before leaving (N.B. The hotter the fart the shorter the wait).
I laid down meaty wet taco fart then waited in the hall for the screaming to begin.
..........You can't depart, without a parting fart !!! :-)
..........You can't depart, without a parting fart !!! :-)
by GentleRapist December 17, 2010
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Fart Parenting • Parting fart • fart • fart nuggets • fart cake • Fart pipe • fart attack • fart blossom • fart-sack • fart cannon
Where your in a room full of strangers and fart a giant fart as you leave the room and that is all anyone ever remembers of you.
Who was that guy who was at the party last night,the one that farted?
Don't know man.But that dude could really fart.
And that is the result of a parting fart.
Don't know man.But that dude could really fart.
And that is the result of a parting fart.
by The Fury 13 September 15, 2010
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