Edison Hoang

He’s like from Vietnam or Laos or some shit.

I dunno. Tiny dick and big hands (for all that rice picking 😏).

Friend portrayed by Kalman
Friend 2 portrayed by Avi
Edison portrayed by Edison

Friend: What’s going on with Edison?
Friend 2: He’s having sex with a bowl of pho because he from the Congo and that’s what they do.

Friend: Are you gay for me?
Friend 2: Yeah
Friend: Follow me 😉

End of Act I
—Act II—

Friend 2: I’m sorry. I must go.

Friend: You dick. You can’t leave me as a single mother.

Friend 2: I have a future, Friend. I can’t skip collage just to take care of a baby. I was 14! I wasn’t thinking and the hormones got the best of me.

*baby crying in the distance*
Friend: You bitch. You woke up the baby!
Friend 2: Thank god I won’t have to be here any longer.

*Friend 2 slams front door as Friend breaks down crying like a little piss baby*

End of Act II
—Finale—

Edison: Hey. Long time no see.

Friend 2: How have you been?
Edison: Remember Friend?
Friend 2: Oh god. Don’t get me started 🙄

Edison: Oh well we’re getting married this upcoming month and I wanted to invite you to the weddi-
Friend 2: YOU’RE WHAT?
*Friend 2 flips table and draws a weapon. However, this is no ordinary weapon. It is an authentic 100 pound broadsword*
Edison: Friend 2, put down the broadsword. I’m sorry, I really am.

*Friend 2 runs out of the bar or wherever the fuck he was and goes onto a bridge*
Friend 2: Goodbye cruel world
*Friend 2 jumps off the bridge dramatically*

—Finé—
(That’s fancy people language for “the end”)

Definition:

P: Edison Hong Kong Edison Hoang Bong Kong

Edison Hoang by ChineseLatkes July 28, 2021

Cheeks 

An Irish phrase meaning shit, derived from ass
(Not to be confused with the literal description of one's buttocks)

"Did you hear the song Aylek$ dropped?"
"Hardly. Her music is absolute cheeks."

"My boyfriend say LaFlame is cheeks."
"Tell your boyfriend I said it's his mixtape that's cheeks."

Cheeks by thecartisan April 26, 2020

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility

I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.

sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019

Breadhead 

Someone who is addicted to obtaining money and building wealth. A money addict and fanatic. Breadheads often work more than one full-time job, and some even participate in illicit activities to "obtain the bread".

A breadhead is like a crackhead, but for money instead of crack.

Breadhead by 🅱️ U S 3 4 8 March 30, 2022

Stink lines

As seen in illustrations or cartoons: Wavy, vertical lines rising above a person, place or thing. Denotes a foul odor.

"You didn't put enough stink lines on your picture of the teacher."

Stink lines by Athene Airheart March 14, 2004

schmegegge 

Yiddish slang word meaning bullshit, baloney, hogwash, nonsense, crock of shit or hot air.

I don't buy the schmegegge about Morty sleeping with Moira.
His version of the story was pure schmegegge.
The whole schmegegge was made up to get Liz a little bit of attention.

schmegegge by budsbabe February 1, 2008

eye bleach 

Looking or experiencing something nice after witnessing something horrid like a disgusting gif or a disturbing video. Typically used as eye bleach are nice images of whatever makes the disturbed person happy.

"Bleach my eyes! Why is that woman's face ripped off!?"
*Looks up images of puppies and kittens.*
"That's good eye bleach."

eye bleach by Rini2012 November 29, 2016