Edgar Acuña 

Some doctors liken it to a tree trunk. Others to a length of anchor rope. And still others compare it to a barber's pole. Whatever it's true dimensions, Edgar Acuña is stuck with a gigantic penis, and science can't help him.

Diagnosed with Phallumegaly (bigness of penis) at a young age, Edgar Acuña grew up without learning how to ride bike... without being able to play little league (protective cups are too small)... without being able to feel comfortable in a locker room or a regular pair of shorts. And it looks as though he'll never be able to enjoy those everyday pleasures.

Recently rejected for yet another risky penis reduction surgery, Edgar is lost. Medical professionals are afraid to operate on his Neanderthal club-sized penis out of a fear of massive blood loss. "When you've got a cannon like Edgar’s, the risk inherent with an invasive procedure is simply too dangerous," explains Dr. Emily Granverse of Institute of Phallumegaly. "I'm afraid Mr. Acuña’s will just have to stumble through life with what seems like, in many respects, a third femur."

Edgar will have to wait for what might be a long, long, long time.

Edgar Acuña is believed to be the leader in penis size-to-wealth ratio!

Edgar Acuña by Ahkuna April 20, 2022

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility

I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.

sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019

Breadhead 

Someone who is addicted to obtaining money and building wealth. A money addict and fanatic. Breadheads often work more than one full-time job, and some even participate in illicit activities to "obtain the bread".

A breadhead is like a crackhead, but for money instead of crack.

Breadhead by 🅱️ U S 3 4 8 March 30, 2022

Stink lines

As seen in illustrations or cartoons: Wavy, vertical lines rising above a person, place or thing. Denotes a foul odor.

"You didn't put enough stink lines on your picture of the teacher."

Stink lines by Athene Airheart March 14, 2004

schmegegge 

Yiddish slang word meaning bullshit, baloney, hogwash, nonsense, crock of shit or hot air.

I don't buy the schmegegge about Morty sleeping with Moira.
His version of the story was pure schmegegge.
The whole schmegegge was made up to get Liz a little bit of attention.

schmegegge by budsbabe February 1, 2008

eye bleach 

Looking or experiencing something nice after witnessing something horrid like a disgusting gif or a disturbing video. Typically used as eye bleach are nice images of whatever makes the disturbed person happy.

"Bleach my eyes! Why is that woman's face ripped off!?"
*Looks up images of puppies and kittens.*
"That's good eye bleach."

eye bleach by Rini2012 November 29, 2016

Stroad

Noun. Portmanteau of "street" and "road": it describes a street, er, road, built for high speed, but with multiple access points. Excessive width is a common feature. A common feature in suburbia, especially along commercial strips. Unsafe at any speed, their extreme width and straightness paradoxically induces speeding. Somewhat more neutral than synonymous traffic sewer.

Did you see what the traffic engineers want to do to our street? They're going to turn it into a total stroad!

Stroad by hammersklavier February 21, 2012