Chinese Bake-Away

The act and decision-making process of ordering a Chinese (and to a lesser extent less monosodium glutamate laden) take-away while baked (stoned). Motivated by inability to cook and a lack of ready consumables, those initiating a bake-away must overcome several major hurdles:

1)Finding a menu while munted
2)Deciding on a finite (as opposed to infinite) number of foodstuffs.
3)Gathering together keys and cash to facilitate transaction
4)Maintaining both by telephone and face-to-face with delivery person, despite awareness that your reality is not that of the world

The bake-away process usually takes one to two hours from start to finish. Spoils are normally eaten out of container resting on nearest available surface or floor.

A summer's day. Two gentlemen and a lady are reclining in the sun's rays. The lady pick up the receiver.
Lady: Mexican accent. "I would like to order a Chinese bake-away ... no, take-away". Giggles. "A baker's dozen of your finest ribs..."

Chinese Bake-Away by Faulkling September 8, 2008