Boghobbit

A grotesque creature of impish stature and ambiguous gender. Lustful and crude, these little critters frequent nightclubs and bars in attempts to "integrate" into normal society. Often they can be spotted in tight clusters ogling women out of their league. But, every now and again an unsuspecting maiden is snatched away in a booze induced stupor to learn the horrors her brothers and father tried so hard to shelter her from. Boghobbits often represent themselves to social groups as skilled in the arts of seduction, when in reality they are mustached rapists from the swamps.

Friend: Hey Hayden, let's go out some time bro!
Me: Sure man, sounds fun!
Friend: Why not invite your roommate to come along as a wingman!
Me: Russo? Nah dude, he's a dirty Boghobbit.
Friend: Aw shit bro, explains a lot.
Me: Yeah, pretty awful, he slinks around the house leaving trails of smegma all over the place.

Boghobbit by JackTheQuipper May 27, 2011