A Belloton is a collection of 'bellend' cyclists - usually sporting all the gear but with no idea. These morons are the type that as soon as they get on a saddle completely forget both the rules of the road and any common sense. Typically you might find a belloton of cyclists insisting on riding four abreast on a country road, who then act indignant towards any oncoming traffic. The belloton is usually headed by a 'Gary' or 'Keith' who when not on his bicycle drives a Nissan Leaf or Honda Jazz.
Last night I had the poor fortune to come across a Belloton on my way home from work. After trying to safely navigate them over the course of 2-3 miles giving them adequate space while I overtook them they all chose to undertake me with just inches between each of them and the passenger side of my vehicle as soon as I slowed entering a 20mph zone.
by TeflonDai August 13, 2025
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