Beating the Mattress

Masturbation. Basically, if no one else is around, who are you going to beat it to but the mattress?

"John was beating the mattress so hard last night that I heard it through the wall."

"Jessica's out tonight. Guess it's me and the mattress."

Beating the Mattress by Apple-sucker July 26, 2012

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Related Words

Beating the Mattress • beating the meat • beating the bishop • beating the dead horse • "Beating the Flush" • beating the bald midget • beating the banana • beating the block • Beating the Bonus Hole • Beating the brush