Arborectalectomy 

From the Latin meaning to remove or have removed the stick from one's ass. A specific cure for most common manifestations of malaise, diptard Fibromyalgia, Emo rectus, bluehairdietus and other non specific pain related maladies. It may not cure Hipsterism, prepyitus or selfassholization syndrome selfpitiousfestus and other specific related illnesses such as psudo self diagnosed Asperger's. Otherwise know as a condition in which one needs to remove a stick from one's ass. Stick in the ass.

You sir are in need of an emergency arborectalectomy!

Arborectalectomy by orthographer October 3, 2011