5%er

A statistical statement based on the common knowledge that only 5% of females in the United States know how to vacate a man’s soul from his body using the art of oral manipulation. It is said that when done correctly all blood flows to the male companions erect penis and away from the brain, making for easier manipulation of one’s wallet and primary aortic vessel.

“Look at her! Shes got quite a set of lips. She must be a real 5%er!”

5%er by Jane D. Pain October 31, 2025

erect as a 5 a.m. penis

adj. Describing something that is very straight or stiff, or someone standing that way.

Tennis instructor: "Evan, you have to bend your knees on that shot!"
Evan: "What, I'm not getting down low enough?"
Tennis instructor: "Low enough? You're as erect as a 5 a.m. penis."

erect as a 5 a.m. penis by stockman09 November 22, 2010

esc F1 F2 F3 F4 F5 F6 F7 F8 F9 F10 F11 F12 insert delete ` 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 - = tab q w e r t y u i o p [ ] \ capslock a s d f g h j k l shift z x c v b n m , . / shift ctrl fn alt space alt ctrl 

This is the peak of bordom, you decide that qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm wasen't enough, and poiuytrewqlkjhgfdsamnbvcxz, and also qazsedcftgbhujmkol, and awsxdrfvgyhnjiklp, etc etc,

Person 1: bro im so boreddddddddddddddddddddd,
Person 2: have you tried esc F1 F2 F3 F4 F5 F6 F7 F8 F9 F10 F11 F12 insert delete ` 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 - = tab q w e r t y u i o p \ capslock a s d f g h j k l shift z x c v b n m , . / shift ctrl fn alt space alt ctrl?
Person 1: OMFG DID YOU NOT READ THE PATCH NOTES??
person 2: wdym?
person 1: IF YOU SAY SOME WORDS THAT ARE TOO LONG YOU-
*person 2 explodes

esc F1 F2 F3 F4 F5 F6 F7 F8 F9 F10 F11 F12 insert delete ` 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 - = tab q w e r t y u i o p [ ] \ capslock a s d f g h j k l shift z x c v b n m , . / shift ctrl fn alt space alt ctrl by hytredfghjkllo June 6, 2023

` 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 - = q w e r t y u i o p [ ] \ a s d f g h j k l ; ' z x c v b n m , . / ~ ! @ # $ % ^ & * ( ) _ + Q W E R T Y U I O P { } | A S D F G H J K L : " Z X C V B N M < > ? 

Wow you are that bored that you went above and beyond and typed this congrats you get nothing.

I was bored and typed

` 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 - = q w e r t y u i o p \ a s d f g h j k l ; ' z x c v b n m , . / ~ ! @ # $ % ^ & * ( ) _ + Q W E R T Y U I O P { } | A S D F G H J K L : " Z X C V B N M < > ?

` 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 - = q w e r t y u i o p [ ] \ a s d f g h j k l ; ' z x c v b n m , . / ~ ! @ # $ % ^ & * ( ) _ + Q W E R T Y U I O P { } | A S D F G H J K L : " Z X C V B N M < > ? by Eternitys bordeom November 16, 2022

ernie 5 star 

A clumsy dork of the highest order, having just proven as much through a telling action or statement.

But ... only as referred to by a higher level dork, confirmed through the use of this phrase.

Derogatory yet playful.

(watches someone poke an eye with the finger brush)
Ha. Ernie 5 star!

ernie 5 star by failureislikely January 24, 2018

Erica 5-E

One of the nicest teachers in the school. Very chill unless you get her mad.

Today in class Erica 5-E made us write some short responses, then let us have some fun and play a game.

Erica 5-E by TypeShitEnthusiast May 26, 2021

9-5er 

A person who sticks to a 9-5 job.

A person involved in a mundane job.

Guy 1: Hey, I listened to your rendition of Red Hot Chili Peppers' Californication
Guy 2: How was it?
Guy 1: It was amazing!! But, that's besides the point! I don't understand why you are a 9-5er when you can clearly be the next Anthony Kiedis!

9-5er by KrisKarzy November 10, 2013