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masturbation roladex

After I take a big shit, I'll woop out the masturbation roladex and shine some pages.
by choug October 13, 2006
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Martyrbation

When C-4 is your Viagra. And your premature ejaculation ensures the only one killed is yourself.
You see, when a good red blooded American nut job will go on a rampage, killing innocent people, and then blow his own brains out, or go down in a shootout with the SWAT team, he's generally pissed off...and he s not saying "God is great" before he kills those people....not like those MARTYRBATION puppets that think theyre doing god's will every time one pops.
by Wørd Üpp March 9, 2013
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Academic Masturbation

Any academic work or activity that is not completely necessary yet feels good to most; Usually the teacher
After sexually relieving myself I realized I had to get on with that Academic Masturbation of a critical thinking assignment that was due the next day.
by Gare-Bear September 15, 2009
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Matterbation

an individual that jerks off in the washroom at work
Matt disappears daily for a good vigorous session of Matterbation
by dumbass1 June 1, 2015
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masterbation chamber

The dormitory of Nickolaus Mitchell. Where he resides 20 out of 24 hours. Smells like pine.
Where's Nick?

In the masterbation chamber.
by Rayman4991 December 29, 2016
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masterbation pooch

A masturbation pooch is a portable sex dog with a flesh light in its ass to suit your beastiality needs any time , any where
C- did you get the new masturbation pooch

B - I don’t need one I got the real thing

C- that’s illegal man try out my masturbation pooch it’ll change your life

Masterbation pooch
by Beastiality is legal May 27, 2018
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masterbation professor

A UBC professor who has a master's degree and is highly able to skillfully bait students to hang out in office hours so they can jerk off on the students as they put a security camera underneath the desks of the TA's who do their seductive bidding as well.
It's not enough to just have a master's degree or a PhD degree in computer signs to be able to teach. In order to become a masterbation professor, you need to be masterful at baiting and jerking off on your students in front of around 200 of them in broad daylight in a large lecture hall just because. You know, take your pencis and use it as a yellow crayon to draw on the big screen. There's plenty of space and room to draw whatever squiggly line you want to disorient your prey.
by MatrixEnergeticWar September 10, 2023
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