Guido

An Italian-American that pretends to be Italian by: Talking with a thick New York accent; driving their cars way too fast with techno music blasting; dressing in tight clothes/valour, with their hair slicked back, gold chains, bracelets and rings and chest hair sticking out; usually being of ignorant towards gays and minorities and disrespectfull of woman; lives in Staten Island or Howard Beach, Queens; gives Italians a bad name although it's okay for Italians to be guidos as long as they dont share the aassholee attitude that most guidos do.

"Nice valour suit, you look like a guido"

by DiZzY DeViL dUcKy January 9, 2004

Guito

A derogatory term for a person of Italian decent, usually those who try to be a stereotypical American-Italian. Similar to racial slurs such as nigger and cracker.

Signs of this include but are not limited to: over-greased hair, Italian accent (even though they aren't actually from, nor have they ever been to, Italy), frequent references to the mob (even though they know no one in the mob), and using "I'm Italian" as an excuse to be rude and/or fat.

Guito: Let's go to the Olive Garden.

Person: I thought you were on a diet?

Guito: Shuddup, I'm Italian, this is how we eat. Don't disrespect me, I'll get cousin Vinny to break your shins.

Person: You don't even have a cousin Vinny. You're such a guito.

by Carolineee October 12, 2005

guido

an italian who is culturally challenged and makes us real italians look bad.

Hey did you guys hear, Kim Cignarella is going out with some guido from Fairfield, what doosh bags.

by traytraytray December 28, 2005

guido workout

A workout which you will witness in almost any commercial gym up and down the country, but especially so in Liverpool. The guilty parties are skinny, scally males who believe that sitting on both the bench press or bicep curl machines for a few reps on each will sculpt a herculean body that will make female jaws hit the floor. They perform the workout with weightlifter gloves on the ends of their stick-like arms, and as they are usually exercising with about 5 or 6 mates, they have intervals of 5 minutes between sets thus making all their "hard work" completely futile. Little do they know that the back and the triceps need equal attention as the previously mentioned body parts, as do the legs, abs and shoulders if they are to look remotely athletic and not end up with man-tits on their skinny bodies. But whatever, the higher the percentage of scallies who are deformed, the better I say.

Hehe, look at those wankers doing that guido workout.

(half an hour later) Ok, I really do need to work my chest here.

by Anonymous May 4, 2005

Guido Moment

Guido Moment - A moment where ignorance overwhelms the logic of an otherwise rational white guy. To Put it plainly, they act like guidos. Guido Moments are unpredictable, an incident as mild as bumping into someone can quickly involve into stand downs, fake threats, and the ever popular rolling up the sleeves to show off how their "guns". usually this is brought on by roid rage. Guido moments are the third largest killer behind tanning booth accidents and watching Godfather 3.

An exmaple of a Guido moment can be brought on scuffing a shoe. Usually the shoe is bought at Banana Republic or Hollister. Since the price of the shoe is so high, the average white dude ends up going crazy and seeking out the guy who scuffed it. This creates a Guido moment.

I had a Guido moment when some dude scuffed my shoe at a club in Sea Side.

by get me out of jersey February 13, 2008

guido

cologne reeking, structure wearing, too much gel motherfucker that'll hit on your girlfriend while you're standing right there. he will also start talking to a girl you're talking to like you ane't there- usually has to little fag friends to back is pussy ass up incase you retaliate. he is not necessarily italian as the name might suggest.

i just met this hottie, then some guido steps in and cock blocks

by drunkenstein April 16, 2004

guido

1) a superficial American male, usually from the Tri-State area, pretending to be of Italian descent through the use of some limited slang in whatever dialect was spoken by his supposed ancestors from il Belpaese. Known for his bad music taste, the guido loves greasy hair, wifebeaters, bling bling, tracksuits, and intercourse with guidettes.

2) the guido style is also spotted in the Italian peninsula, particularly amongst wannabe gangsters of the camorra. Their trademarks in Italy are: wifebeaters, tracksuits, cars with strobo lights, a bad command of Italian, being overweight, fur anoraks and - above all - an unhidden love of Gigi D'Alessio's music.

3) a derogatory term for an Italian. For someone who actually is from Italy, being associated with American guidos is one of the worst possible offences.

'That guy must've spent all his money on pimping that piece of trash!'
'That should come to you as no surprise: he's a guido!'

'Are you sure this is Naples? There are so many guidos around it feels like Jersey!'

'Hey dude, in the US we call Italians "guidos".'
'In Italy we call Americans who call us guidos "rednecks".'

by vafangù December 27, 2009