Number 3

n. (NUM-burr THR-ee) A condition characterized by the sudden onset of an acute and intense inchy sensation, centered on an individual's anal sphincter, and which demands the immediate attention of those afflicted. The condition is caused by two distinct factors: 1. Improper/ ineffective post-bowel movement wiping techniques, generally associated with laziness or other hurried factors, and 2. Physical activity necessitating the use of an individual's legs and buttocks, such as walking. There are multiple theories which attempt to explain the mechanics which lead to the condition, most studies point to the combination of drying feces and taint sweat to explain the end result of the condition.

v. The act of ass wiping, generally in the standing position, for the purposes of removing the poo/sweat slurry from an individual's stink-star, as well as the only known method of relieving the intense itching sensation associated with the condition.

Stanley: Man, this hike has really been swell, don't you think Dre?

Dre: Yeah, I guess, but you rushed me back at the house when I was going Number 2. And now, I got a serious case of Number 3!

Boomquisha: You two are nasty, I don't even know why I'm here...

Stanley: Don't worry Dre, if you can't make it back, I'll give you my shirt to use to go Number 3 find that tree.

Dre: Bet

by BigNutzCracker July 6, 2019

Flag