Jesus Rape

When a fundamental Christian attempts to push their religious beliefs on you even after you said "NO!"

The defination jesus rape explains itself.

by redneckatheist.com March 24, 2006

pet jesus

A pet about 40 cm's tall. It waddles around like a penguin and sucks in its checks. It cannot talk. You hold it on a leach and it occasionally tugs on your skirt but only because it wants attention. They look like a miniature versions of Jesus, hence the reason for the name.. They cannot blink but have huge eyes and very small pupils. Pet Jesus's wear a typical Jesus style garment and only eat crackers...lots and lots of crackers..... They do not drink anything.

A pet jesus makes an adorable pet yet they are commonly found at the pound as their owners get tired of them because they are a constant nuisance. They are also incredibly creepy, for example they do not sleep. When you go to bed it will stand right next to your bed and stare at you for the duration of the night and most people find this incredibly violating and terrifying...

John: Hey bob, i see you have brought along your pet jesus

Bob: Yup, got any crackers?

John: Sure Thaaaang!

by Petjesus November 16, 2010

drinking with jesus

The act of drinking in solitude without the connotation of being an alcoholic.

-I can't believe you pregamed alone last night, you're such a loser.
-Bro, I was drinking with Jesus.

by yeeserious October 20, 2005

Jesus Land

Any state that gave Bush the electoral vote. Usually directed at the south.

Jesus Land loves you!

by JohnJohn1186 November 9, 2004

khaki jesus

Khaki Jesus aka Steve Irwin. He is the only person to rock a pair of generic khakis

Friend 1: have you ever heard of Steve Irwin

Friend 2: do you mean khaki Jesus

by Gopackmc September 28, 2020

australian jesus

Australian Jesus is a white guy with long hair who heads his own cult in the Australian outback. He appeals to monied persons, and ignores the poor. He convinces them to leave their families, show up in Australia (if they're foreigners), and place their monies in the palm. Then, he puts them into a heightened emotional state that makes them cry. If you wish to abandon all that is good and true in life, and then cry, then you are encouraged to seek out the cult of Australian Jesus.

Example for Australian Jesus:

"You don't believe in Jesus!?"
"No, of course I believe in Him. He's that one fella in Australia."

by James Headfield March 10, 2020

on baby jesus

its just somethin i made up

somebody: you lying
me: on baby jesus i aint lyin
ian trippin on baby jesus
on baby jesus yhu mad weird 🥱💯.

by Ty💀 September 18, 2020