drinking with jesus

The act of drinking in solitude without the connotation of being an alcoholic.

-I can't believe you pregamed alone last night, you're such a loser.
-Bro, I was drinking with Jesus.

by yeeserious October 20, 2005

Jesus Land

Any state that gave Bush the electoral vote. Usually directed at the south.

Jesus Land loves you!

by JohnJohn1186 November 9, 2004

Jesus-ey

The act of being kind, caring, benevolent

Clarie: "Sheila, your new jeans make your ass look fat!!"

Shelia: "Geez Clarie, that was not a very Jesus-ey thing to say...You bitch!"

by Lt 50 December 2, 2009

Jesus rail

n.

The passenger hand rail above the car window. Used by people who can't drive, those who prefer to be in control, or frightened mothers.

(in car, Driver accelerates)

Passenger: Jesus! (holding onto car hand rail for dear life)
Driver: You don't have to hold onto the Jesus rail, I'm doing the speed limit!

Passenger: (holding onto car hand rail, eyes closed)
Driver: Stop holding the Jesus rail, I'm not trying to kill you!

etc.

by SilverGirl78 April 8, 2011

Conversational Jesus

A person with the ability to turn a conversation about water into a conversation about wine.

A: After my work-out i was really thirsty, i would have killed for some water.
B: Then why didn't you just un-cork a good bottle?
A: Un-cork? .... are you talking about wine again?
B: Of course, what else?
A: Man, you'r a true Conversational Jesus!..

by Darkwing Warming April 20, 2011

out-Jesus

verb - To attempt to appear more pious or religious than someone else for personal gain.

The two conservative candidates didn't even talk about the important issues in their campaign ads, they just kept trying to out-Jesus each other.

by thatguy@31 May 30, 2006

jesus goggles

If you say that someone is wearing Jesus goggles, you mean that that person has been so on fire for God that they think someone is more sexually attractive because they too have the same level of passion for Jesus instilled in their heart:

"How did you manage to get such a beautiful girlfriend when you look how you do?"
"Brah pls- Jesus is my wingman"

""Why is she dating him, he ain't fly"
"Ahh man homie, she must have her jesus goggles on tiggggghhhtttt"
"Ahmen to that"
"Mmmmhmmm"

by uj6tyjhvj March 29, 2015