Spank Skank

One who loves spanks and begs for them.
He said he was ‘ready for bed’ but I knew he was a spank skank and wanted spankings.
by Spank Skank August 06, 2021
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Southbank spank

When you masturbate at the BFI Southbank cinema and like it. Also known as "Southbank wank"
Shall we go watch Goodfellas for a Southbank spank?
by philmphan July 07, 2023
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Stank And Spank

A “Stank And Spank” is an excretory event during which, upon the arrival of the sole participant, masturbation and defacation are simultaneously commenced in tandem earnest.
“William, quoth his fair mother, participated in a Stank And Spank in his bathroom. The combined smell of the semen and feces was quite foul by all acounts. Surely, the worst event to happen since the overrun of Kvatch by Daedra.”
by eternalsadness January 30, 2022
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spanking the lady monkey

A woman, of any age that is pleasuring herself via masturbation. She can be using a sex toy or her fingers in this act.
Carol was so busy spanking the lady monkey she didn’t notice she’d spilled her margarita all over the bed.
by Old crazy momma November 11, 2020
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Hanky Spank

When you spank someone so hard they immediately ejaculate all over the ceiling or floor (depending on which way they’re bent over).
Example 1: I spent all day cleaning my ceiling after I hanky spanked Vanessa and Leroy last night. It straight up smelled like salty fish and swamp water.

Example 2: Kimberly enjoyed being hanky spanned so much, their ceiling starting growing black mold from the excessive moisture.

Example 3: “Dude how did you break your wrist?”
“I hanky spanked Kyle on the kitchen floor last night and slipped on his cum making a sandwich at 2am.”
by doctordual639 June 23, 2021
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The sentence no-one wants to hear!

The BBC are preparing to send an emergency broadcast alert, Highways England shuts all the motorways apart from emergency and military personal - whom will be on standby, the UK economy ceases trading, the Government shuts down internet access for the entire country; these are all the impacts of when Spack No.1 fires up his spanking fetish...
MUUUUUUUUM! JACK'S SPANKING AGAIN!
by Jack Spank9049 July 28, 2022
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The absolute most catastrophic event in the Earth's history, should it happen.

The BBC will send out an emergency broadcast alert, all motorways in the UK will be shut apart from emergency services and military personnel. Southampton will be relegated to the Championship, Pareth Pouthgate will sign a new contract with England, Tesco will stop its £3.50 meal deal, Alex Turner will no longer want to be part of The Strokes, an asteroid will be on a crash collision course with Earth and nothing can be done about it, Pisstiano Penaldo and Parry Pane will both score hattricks against Southampton, Portsmouth will win the Caribou cup again, Bluestar Bus will stop its £1 fares after 6PM, Domino's will no longer do Two for Tuesday, Pizza Hut will stop its £5 favourites, Papa Johns will stop its £8.99 large pizza collection deal, Virgin Media will go out of business, the sale of Elf Bar vapes will be banned in the UK, the servers for Call of Duty World at War will shut down, labour will lose the next general election. These aren't all the events that will happen and just the ones I have on the top of my head...
Spack No.2:MUUUUUUUUM! JACK'S SPANKING AGAIN!

Rishi Sunak or who ever the fuck is PM at the time: "You must ration all essential supplies now and limit outside contact"
by Jack Spank9049 July 31, 2022
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