Five Man Failure

Five Man Failure:Small business with less than 10 people. The business is usually dysfunctional. The CEO of the company has 'observation blindness' and coddles bad employees. In a large company issue employees would have been sacked for more dynamic candidates.

That tube store employee is passive aggressive and never emailed me to tell me that my special order was cancelled two months ago. They're running a "Five Man Failure".

by Energysoul July 26, 2016

catastrophic raid failure

Catastrophic RAID failure means your ultra-secret data saw the attack helicopters over the horizon and locked itself in the impenetrable underground bunker and detonated landmines and deployed automated weaponry all around the base. Enemy forces were wiped out in their entirety.

The good news is that your data is secure and bravely refused to allow itself to be compromised. Bad news is that I don't think your data is ever coming out of there again.

Hello,

Unfortunately earlier today the host that your VPS resides on had suffered a catastrophic RAID failure and was irrecoverable. We had attempted to restore the data but were unsuccessful. We have since created a new container and emailed you the new login information. We apologize for the inconvenience this has caused.

Regards,

by Peculiar Musings July 14, 2016

e-mail failure

when you type someone’s name wrong in an email but the government knows who you were trying to contact and contacts them through esp anyways.

The e-mail failure had someone thinking about the sender during the day.

by Coop Dupe December 12, 2019

sense of humour failure

A phrase used by a manager as an awkward semi-apology after they lose their temper at their employees. This is the closest to an apology you're likely to get.

Prevalent in the UK tech and consulting sector.

(after boss has stopped shouting obscenities at their staff)
"I'm afraid I've had a sense of humour failure..."

by QuartermasterGeralt June 3, 2020

Joe Van Falier 2.0

Still a straight up Overwatch loving nerd, except he no longer plays his PS4 as much and has converted to PC Gaming. 77 Inches may have been a slight exaggeration, though his cyok is a solidly healthy size and his bitches are increasing. Caught him chatting up some "kinky" (Dan's words) gal, which has made me very proud; Well done my brother. Still blonde with blue eyes but so far he has not stabbed me in the back and we maintain a strong relationship. Since last time he has said 1 more swear word (Knob I think?) and his grades are still "Peng". His height has increase to approximately 5'7 or so and he is easily able to knock any fool out with his dojo moves. Wham eyebrows as always...

Kinky Gal: Joe Van Falier 2.0 is epic, I love his girth and charisma.

by saint_jon February 6, 2022

The Virgin Essence failed experimentation

basically they wanted to collect every particle of a human female menstrual period cycle to study and analyze the egg that's being discarded through this process but they couldn't ever find a female clean or enough or hygienic enough to work with during these end times...and they look to me for an solution and i had a simple one that i did not offer it and ask them to leave me out of science the study and research of the world around them because its purely can be nonsense and heresy...and its too deep for me to speak on if i wanted to ...i have more important things to worry about instead of an unfertilized rotten egg...just an cliche expression not a true definitive expression because again i have no knowledge of what's going on during this process

do they have to study absolutely everything like that and The Virgin Essence failed experimentation too? they look for a cure in everything but their own shit.

by Megasus Thirst Jesus Christ June 7, 2022

Being a Failure

Being a Failure is when Steven He's dad grabs the sandal and gives you permanent emotional damage.

You are being a failure.
-Steven's Dad

by j4k3yy November 11, 2022