choking the gopher

A slang term meaning for a man to "jack-off" or "masterbate."

"OH MY GOD,that guy was totally choking the gopher when i walked in the room!"

by Trixi Star February 6, 2009

Whack the Gopher

While tapping a woman from behind, pull out your penis abruptly and jab it into her ass numerous times at random intervals. When she cocks her head back in surprise, whack her on the back of the head with your shoe.

I had to go to the Assaker house again last night. John's mom wanted me to play 'Whack the Gopher' with her again.

by Big Nose Jewboy November 9, 2007

Chat Gopher

When a person goes online periodically using a chat program to check who's online, usually ignoring friends of the same sex while at the same time annoying the heck out of every poor sod on the Gopher's contact list (because of the annoying log-on alert window). This can also be used for the purpose of seeking attention of people in the Gopher's contact list that are online.

This is akin to the gopher on the 1980's movie "Caddy Shack" sticking its head out of the ground to scope out the world.

Tony "Chat Gophered" last night to see if any chicks he liked were online...

by A. Innes and T. Phung September 1, 2005

Screaming Gopher

While having vigorous intercourse, the reaction caused by pulling out too far and accidentally slipping from the vagina to the anus.

You should have seen the Screaming Gopher I gave my girlfriend last night! I though she was gonna turn around and smack me.

by Sweat Feet January 13, 2010

Grab Your Gopher

Verb.

Pronounciation- "Grab Yo're Go Fur"

To masturbate. You know, beat your meat, choke your chicken.

Frank: "Hey dude, did you grab your gopher last night?

Mitch: "Na dude. My grandma was over."

by Koolguy_GT500 March 16, 2010

The gopher

Putting your fingers in a girl's vagina and then popping your fingers out of her butt, sniffing around like a gopher.

Relax, she is pleased because i gave her the gopher.

by sex master j balls June 18, 2011

gophering

when you have to shit really bad, but you aren't close to a bathroom, the turd starts to come out, but you suck it back in your ass as you walk swiftly to the john. like a gopher popping out of a hole.

i had to shit so bad, that turd was gophering!

by here coco! April 11, 2008